Equal distribution of both gender types in every course in the tertiary level of education

Hello! I will take IELTS (Academic) exam and it will be a big help if you can give me feed backs on my work or give me a possible score for this. Thanks a lot!

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree?

In some countries, there is an equal distribution of both gender types in every course in the tertiary level of education. However, it is not necessary to require this similar gender ratio because of some drawbacks. I feel that that the admission of students in every course should be regardless of any gender and need not be equal.

Based on the census, there is a greater proportion of men than women in most countries which makes the claim unrealistic. There will be difficulty in meeting the required number of students because of the disproportion on the gender ratio.

We should also consider the fact that some courses are suitable to a specific gender. For instance, jobs that demand physical strength are associated with men like carpentry while nursing courses tend to attract more women.

It is also unfair to base the selection of students on gender. Universities should accept students according to their academic qualifications. In this way, there will be equal opportunities for both genders and the right to pursue their preferred careers.

However, some experts believe that the claim creates an environment of diversity which can result to productive ideas. As a matter of fact, some companies maintain a ratio of gender diversity because it is proved by research to produce favorable results in work places.

I believe that it is not realistic to have equal distribution of both gender types in every course. Some courses are specific to a gender type and the admission to a university should be according to a student's academic qualifications.

I can help to assist you. I feel that in that in the first paragraph, you should rearrange the words in the last sentence. It would make the sentence better to read. Here is a suggestion: "I feel that students should be admitted to every course regardless of equal distribution of gender." The reader can fully grasp that you are discussing students, what should happen, and why this could be an issue.

You should change disproportion on ratio to "disproportion of ratio".

I feel that the evidence in the second and third paragraph only has facts. I think you will have to give your opinion with the facts.

The fifth paragraph, change result to productive to "...result in productive ideas".

Thank you so much for your feedback! :) What could be my possible score for this? Thanks!

I would think this is a really high score. Possibly a 7 or 8.

Thanks so much! I really appreciate your response. :)