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Toefl: "To err is human" - listening to the advice of family and friends


sandipsinh 37 / 90 3  
Feb 20, 2014   #1
Some people believe that the best way of learning about life is by listening to the advice of family and friends. Other people believe that the best way of learning about life is through personal experience. Compare the advantages of these two different ways of learning about life. Which do you think is preferable? Use specific examples to support your preference .

Personal experience can be deemed as a teacher who gives us practical experience, so family members and friend's advice can be great support or a guide to resolve the quandaries. Advice from family members can be considered most wise notion as they come through parents self - experience, on the other hand life will be full of trials if we determine to learn through our experiences, living lessons of not repeating the mistakes and continuing the good efforts. Both has their own exquisite merits as such it is difficult to comprehend that whether life becomes easy by our experience or with the help of family and folks advice. I would be presenting elucidation about whether to lead life on personal experience or by seeking family and friend advice.

Firstly, Family and friends are selfless well - wisher and advisers of ours. They have no meanness to acquire anything form us in return of any favor. Parents already walked through the land strips that children would be walking on in future. They have better views, solutions for predicaments and self - experienced lessons to share with children's. That's why probably they can easily forecast the result of our action and choices beforehand. Children's those who focus on parent's guidance and suggestion have to face least difficulties in their life. Also they get aid from their parents to make critical decision of their life that results into less fatal results of their efforts. Parent's advice increase that chances of good result or success. Form my personal experience - My father suggested me to take medical stream after my 10th grade but I stubborn to study accounts and now after marriage and shifting to USA, I remorse to not listen to him as medical professional earn abundant in America.

Self- experience introduced us with our potential and capabilities, but we would tend to commit several errors. It might also delay our progress. Although there are being that are born genius and efficiently handle their lives and make choices relevant to it but other humans has to seek their way out to make their lives hassle free. Personal - experience would also be time consuming but it will teach us to not choose a path that will demotivate us and offer complex outcome. I took independent decision to study diploma course of management, However i observed lot of knowledge but after doing it i realized that Master of business management would have granted me enormous opportunities to make prospective career. I learnt a lesson that shortcut to success lengthens the way to the destination.

As it is said "To err is human", we inadvertently commit certain mistakes in return gets familiar with various ways to tackle hurdles of life. But I was wondering if we can download a readily available content for our academic examination, why we cannot make maximum use of available resource - our parents and friend to decisions of our lives. Obstacles are not less even with the guidance but directions indeed prepare us to face challenges of life.

mottana 2 / 4  
Feb 20, 2014   #2
It is good Essay . Well structured , Your examples are bit personal .
Form my personal experience - My father suggested me to take medical stream after my 10th grade but I stubborn to study accounts and now after marriage and shifting to USA, I remorse to not listen to him as medical professional earn abundant in America.

and again you are saying
I took independent decision to study diploma course of management, However i observed lot of knowledge but after doing it i realized that Master of business management would have granted me enormous opportunities to make prospective career. I learnt a lesson that shortcut to success lengthens the way to the destination.

Here I feel you can give more general examples.
OP sandipsinh 37 / 90 3  
Feb 20, 2014   #3
Hey thanks for that tip
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Feb 21, 2014   #4
You need to have a meaningful title for your threads. (this title has been attended by us). It's a forum rule and please comply with that rule. Also, you need to choose the most appropriate forum when you open a new thread. TOEFL essays should be opened in Writing Feedback forum and this essay has been moved from Grammar usage to Writing Feedback. Please follow these instructions when you open new threads.
SHanafi 120 / 415 93  
Feb 22, 2014   #5
Hiiiii...
I do not know exactly about the rules of TOEFL examination. For me you reflect your experience in this essay. when I read this like read an autobiography, but overall I like the way you deliver your idea and also your diction. I get many new vocabularies, thank you :)
montegrappa 3 / 12  
Feb 23, 2014   #6
My english is not so good at all but I'm trying my best to give some unprofessional comments :]

so family members and friend's advice can be great support or a guide to resolve the quandaries.
Parallelism is needed:
1. the advice from family members and that from friends
2. family member's and friend's advice

Advice from family members can be considered most wise notion as they come through parents self - experience.On the other hand,our life will be full of trials if we decide to learn through our experiences, living lessons of not repeating the mistakes and continuing the good efforts.

Both hashave their own exquisite merits as suchthus it is difficult for us to comprehend that whether life becomes easyeasier by our experience or with the help of family and folks advice.
OP sandipsinh 37 / 90 3  
Feb 24, 2014   #7
Hey montegrappa,

Great help folk.

Thank form bringing those basic mistakes which i must to not make.
But i have an question, The advice form families and those from friend. isn't this fragment is rare. as subject gets missing after and That of friend - (what) that????

i am not smart enough to understand the concept but need help to make my grammar better.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Mar 5, 2014   #8
I feel your essay is too lengthy and I wonder whether you were able to finish it within the time allowed for this task. You need to hold on to an essay structure that helps you manage time effectively while including all essential feature that helps you earn a decent score. I may have provided the most appropriate essay structure in that regard.
Pahan 1 / 1,907 553  
Mar 5, 2014   #9
dumi is right about the size of your essay. I too feel it is quite bulky and you really do not have to write so much to gain a decent score for this task. Follow her instructions on the structure and I am sure that will help you a lot.

Both has their own exquisite merits

Both have their own merits

Firstly, Family and friends are selfless well - wisher and advisers of ours.

First, family and friends act selflessly in our relationships and they never intend any bad outcome for us.


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