Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


Is it a fact that earning extremely high salaries by few people is good for the country?


devold 1 / -  
Mar 14, 2022   #1

effect of making by few an extremely huge profit comparing to others



Nowadays, the fact that some individuals can make an extremely huge profit compared to others has resulted in a controversy whether it will benefit the country or government should take actions to prevent the consequences it may bring about. In my opinion, I believe these two sides have their strengths and drawbacks.

On the one hand, the nation and its people can gain significant benefits from those earning an excessive amount of money. Firstly, the higher salaries individuals earn, the more personal income tax they pay to the government's budget, which will be expended for public facilities and services. Additionally, many rich people often spend their property for charitable activities such as donations, building schools for orphans, helping the homeless and people with difficult circumstances, and so on. More importantly, these high-income people earn their livings, which also benefit the others, mostly by their ability as well as time and endeavor they have spent that may be far more than the rest, which makes it justifiable for them to make such a profit. Thus, it is reasonable for the government to support a few people to keep earning high salaries to some extent.

On the other hand, individuals with extremely high incomes in comparison with the others have brought about some significant social issues, particularly the inequality gap between rich and poor. With a large amount of money, the rich have more means to earn more such as investment, relationships, and so on, whereas the poor have lesser and lesser ways to make a living. As a result, the rich get richer, and the poor is poorer, leading to social conflicts, even violent activities. For instance, in the USA, the gap is growing considerably between rich and poor in recent years, with 80 percent of the total nation's property belonging to 1 percent of citizens. Especially due to the COVID-19 pandemic, while the rate of unemployment increases substantially, more and more billionaires have appeared. Consequently, there have been many protests, including violent ones, as well as robberies and even suicides. Therefore, it is urgent for the government to adjust the policy to reduce the gap, probably by controlling the amount one can earn.

In conclusion, I believe people have their justification for their high salaries to some length, but it will bring not only benefits but also problems to the community. To solve the problems before it becomes sophisticated, adjustments should be performed by the government.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4770  
Mar 15, 2022   #2
The first paragraph will lose points for lack of restatement clarity. The 2 public opinions must be presented as individual sentences to avoid long and confusing sentence meanings. The current structure indicates a lack of control over sentence formation on the part of the writer. The first part of the presentation offers a factual statement which indicates a writer's opinion rather than the sentiments of the ouginal prompt. something that should be avoided when completing the restatement part.

The writer has not created a clear demarcation in the discussion paragraphs. It appears that both public opinion discussions come from the personal ideas of the writer. There is a lack of public justifications to the presentation as required by the original references to "some people" and "others". These 2 opposing sides must be presented clearly through the correct use of appropriate pronouns. Though the discussions will be given scores, it will not be as high as if these were properly formatted.

The writer must never present his opinion as a conclusion. The concluding summary is not structured for additional discussion. Doing so will create an open-ended essay which could lead to a failing score. The concluding summary is an integral and import aspect of this essay that should never be incorrectly formatted.


Home / Writing Feedback / Is it a fact that earning extremely high salaries by few people is good for the country?
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳