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how your family's experience or cultural history enriched you or presented


tonydengcnu 23 / 17  
Nov 30, 2008   #1
My mother's hometown is located in Northeast China, an extremely cold and impoverished area. Whenever I went there, I used to help my grandparents make fire and cook. Since we used coal as fuel, the house was always filled with disgusting smells. Then I designed a simple absorptive device to tackle the exhaust gas, and the situation improved greatly. This was my first experience in research on exhaust gas.

My mother is talented in chemistry and exerts a great influence on my study. She majored in leather chemical engineering and engaged herself in chemical industry upon graduation. Now, as the regional manager of a leading international chemical manufacturer, she is frequently invited to deliver lectures in universities. I admire her very much, and hope to be as great a talent as her. In my studies, in case of any difficulties, I often turn to her for help, especially in experimentation. She can always offer me valuable suggestions and help me complete my experiment or projects to great satisfaction. In addition, I take solving chemistry questions as a real pleasure and always get totally absorbed in it. Therefore, I keep myself one of the top students in chemistry course and have got many full marks in the tests. Consequently, I chose chemistry for my extended paper without any hesitation.

Nowadays, chemistry is closely related to everyday life. In the future, I hope I could be engaged in chemical studies, and apply the achievements to construction engineering. With such an ambition, I am determined to major in chemical engineering.

University of Washington is one of the best-known universities in the whole world. My former teacher mentioned its Engineering Department on more than one occasions. The experienced faculties and excellent facilities there are what I am longing for. Moreover, an impressive number of graduates from University of Washington achieve great success in their respective field. Therefore, I hope I can study in your university, learn my favorite major and realize my dreams.

EF_Kevin 8 / 13,335 129  
Dec 1, 2008   #2
I admire her very much, and hope to be as great a talent as she is .

...me complete my experiments or projects to great satisfaction.

In the future, I hope to be engaged in chemical studies, and apply the achievements to construction engineering.

My former teacher mentioned its Engineering Department on more than one occasion . The experienced faculty and excellent facilities there are what I am longing for. Moreover, an impressive number of graduates from University of Washington achieve great success in their respective fields.

Good ending!

:)
janaylloyd09 4 / 9  
Dec 9, 2008   #3
in the beginning, you stated off with a little background info, which was nice but you kind of lost me in the second paragraph. I grew a little bored. But, you recovered me towards the end!!!!!!! Restructure that second paragraph and you'll be good to go.


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