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Fashion is one of essential aspects on people characteristic.


UQ17 3 / 4  
Dec 8, 2016   #1
Q: Some people say that the clothes people wear are the most important indication of what they are like. Others, however, say that people should not be judged by the clothes they wear.

Recently, fashion development has become popular in the society. It indicates that fashion is one of essential aspects on people characteristic. Several inhabitants argue that what people are like can be seen from the clothes which they wear. In the other word, contrary, others say that people cannot be indicated by their appearance. In my point of view, both arguments are true and reasonable for some extents.

The majority of people give opinion that they can express their personality from clothes. It is mainly because they want to show that they are extra ordinary people. For example, mangers of big company always wear tidy and luxurious clothes because it is to show that they are wealthy man with good occupation. Then, other case is artists always wear latest clothes to display that they are stylish people and they are popular people. As a result, this model is become common assessment in the society that clothes can indicate who the people are.

On the other hand, several groups of people give opinion that clothes are not depicted the people are like, because in the cutting-edge era people tend easy going including in the clothes style. Usually, they wear casual clothes which are appropriate in every moment. For instance, in Indonesia, locals tend to wear traditional clothes such Batik because it suits every summits either formal and informal situation there. Other reason is many people do not want show their expression in clothes. For illustrates is businessman even though they wealthy man they always wear ordinary clothes. As an impact, according to the above arguments common people tend to assess others without see what the clothes they wear.

In conclusion, based on the above views, people have two sides in this case. However, I would argue that both views are acceptable through explanations I gave.

Dioba 68 / 104 7  
Dec 8, 2016   #2
Hi,there are several mistakes in your summary.

1.It indicates that fashion is one of essential aspects on people characteristic-->please give more explanation about this sentence, what the relation between fashion and people characteristics? it looks like still a missing link you not including in that sentence.

2. In the other word,On the contrary , others say that ...---> if you want to make contrasting points, you can only write such as however, although, nevertheless withoutin the other word.

3.For example, mangers ( managers, miss spelling) of big company always ...
... artists always wear the(superlative should be follow by article) latest clothes to display that they are stylish people and they are popular people . ( repetition, try to change with proper pronouns)

4.For instance, in Indonesia, locals( what local? i think you should write more clearly local citizens or local inhabitants, because in Cambridge, the meaning of local is "from, existing in, serving or responsible for small area) tend to wear traditional clothes such Batik ( What is Batik? for the readers which do not know about Batik, they will confuse what Batik and how Batik looks like, try to give short description about Batik)

Keep writing!


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