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IELTS TASK 2: Too much fast foods consumed and higher tax as some solution

yirapyirap 1 / -  
Mar 3, 2019   #1

IELTS TASK 2: Higher tax on fast food

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The world we are living is full of fast food sold everywhere. However, in some cases fast food is the main cause of many health problems. To solve this matter, governments tend to apply a higher tax on fast food. Personally, I totally agree with this statement for these following reasons.

It seems to me that governments should quickly establish the policy of increasing tax in fast food. The first reason behind it is that restaurants or enterprises selling fast food will have to reduce amount of this kind of food to the market. If fast food does not appear frequently on market or be sold with high price, consumers will cut off their demand for eating fast food. Therefore, people can avoid risks of getting sick from high amount of cholesterol or fat in fast food.

The next reason to raise the fast food tax is that the government should spend the money from tax on developing public health for the community. While we are making effort to prevent toxic factors of fast food from getting into our body, we improve the health services at the same time to offer our community sufficient access to healthcare system. It is much more beneficial for civil as their health is specially taken into account by the authorities.

To sum up, for a great number of people, fast food becomes a big love and eating them is hard to be a changeable habit in short time. Still, we can aware of harm from fast food and know the outcome if we eat them too excessively. I suppose we need to change ourselves and the governments will help us consume less on fast food by raising the tax.

Holt [Contributor] - / 9,061 2735  
Mar 4, 2019   #2
Hong, this was a very well written essay until you had to write the concluding paragraph. The concluding paragraph is always written as a summary or recap of the previous discussion covering the following topics:

1. Restatement of the discussion topic
2. Your opinion of the topic
3. Reasons for your opinion
4. Closing sentence

I admire the way that you were able to make yourself understood clearly using your intermediate grasp of the English language. While you did have grammatical errors strewn throughout the essay, these mistakes did not impede the understanding of what you were trying to say in the paragraph. While you need to work on the cohesiveness of your presentation, it was, at the very least, coherent enough to gain you a passing score in the C&C and GRA sections. These are the main problem areas of your essay that you should pay attention to during your next practice test.

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