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The Most Favorite Leader in Indonesia by Grahyta


Grahyta24 6 / 12 2  
Dec 19, 2015   #1
Leadership is the human ability to enlist the aid and support of others in the accomplishment of a common task. People in this world have someone or a leader or some leader who admired. In my opinion, people must have figure who are admired to give motivations in their life. In my life, I have two leaders who admired. They are leaders that work in my country, Indonesia.

Ir. Basuki Tjahaja Purnama, M.M is one of leader who admired. He was a governor of DKI Jakarta who started since November 19th, 2014. People usually call him as Ahok. He was born in Manggar, East Belitung on June 29th, 1996. Before he is being a governor, he was a governor deputy of DKI Jakarta. He had changed Jokowi's (Joko Widodo) position since Jokowi started as president of Indonesia. He graduated from Trisakti University and Presetya Mulya Business School. He was a member of commission II of the House of Representatives for the 2009-2004 term. He is ever been a regent in East Belitung.

He started his popularity when he was being a candidate of governor deputy and he has showed in television in many times. I know him in television at the first time. In addition, I started to search his profiles and biography on the internet. Also, I searched about him on Youtube to know how he promoted hisself as a candidate of governor deputy.

Second leader who is the most favorite is Dr. (H.C) Ir. Tri Rismaharini, M.T. She is very well known, not only in Indonesia but also in others country. As such she is ever been the first lady who selected as the best mayor of the world in 2014. Also, I know her from television who informed her as the best mayor of the world in 2014.

Risma, she usually called by others people was born in Kediri, East Java on November 20th, 1961. She is a mayor of Surabaya since September 28th, 2010. Risma is the first lady who selected as a mayor of Surabaya. She is very bravely to tackle problems in Surabaya.

Ahok is the same as Risma to tackle problems in Indonesia. They are bravely leaders. Therefore, those are admired by people. Also, the thing that makes me become their admire is their resoluteness to maintain laws in Indonesia. I want all leader in Indonesia becoming leaders like them and bringing the citizen as priority in their life. They do not only think about money or themselves but also think about development in Indonesia and make Indonesia to a better country.
mrrocks57 1 / 2 1  
Dec 20, 2015   #2
Leadership is the human ability to enlist the aid and support of others in the accomplishment of a common task. A LEADER IS ALSO SOMEONE WHO IS ABLE TO MOTIVATE AND INPIRE THOSE WHO ADMIRE HIM/HERPeople in this world have someone or a leader or some leader who admired. In my opinion, people must have figure who are admired to give motivations in their life.Mabey add a sentance or two here about some general ways that a leader can inpire his/her followers In my life, I have two leaders who i admire, both from my home country of IndonesiaThey are leaders that work in my country, Indonesia.

Ir. Basuki Tjahaja Purnama, M.M is one of leader who admired. He was a governor of DKI Jakarta who started IN November 19th, 2014. People usually call him as Ahok. He was born in Manggar, East Belitung on June 29th, 1996. Before he BECAME governor, he was a governor deputy of DKI Jakarta. He had TAKEN Jokowi's (Joko Widodo) position since Jokowi started as president of Indonesia. He graduated from Trisakti University and Presetya Mulya Business School. He was a member of commission II of the House of Representatives for the 2009-2004 term. He HAS SINCE BEEN a regent in East Belitung.

He started GAINING popularity when he was being a candidate of governor deputy WERE HE BECAME WELL KNOWN THROUGH HIS MANY APPEARENCES ON TELIVISON. I know him in television at the first time . In additionTO HIS APPEARANCES ON TV, I started to RESEARCH HIM on the internet, AND LEARNED MORE about him on Youtube to SEE how he promoted HIMSELF as a candidate of governor deputy.

A Second leader who is A FAVORITE OF MINE is Dr. (H.C) Ir. Tri Rismaharini, M.T. She is very well known, not only in Indonesia but also INTERNATIONALLY. As such she BECAME the first lady TO BE selected as the best mayor of the world in 2014.(Do you have a source for this. who selected her?) I ALSO KNOW ABOUT her from television who ANNOUNCED her as the best mayor of the world in 2014.

Risma, AS SHE IS usually called, was born in Kediri, East Java on November 20th, 1961. She HAS BEEN a mayor of Surabaya since September 28th, 2010. Risma is the first WOMAN TO BE selected as a mayor of Surabaya. She HAS BRAVELY tackled problems in Surabaya.

Ahok is the same as Risma to tackle problems in Indonesia. They are BRAVE leaders, AND ARE THEREFORE admired by MANYpeople. Also, the thing that makes me ADMIRE THEM is their resoluteness to maintain laws in Indonesia. I want all leader in Indonesia becoming leaders like them and bringing the citizen as priority in their life. They do not only think about money or themselves but also think about development in Indonesia and make Indonesia to a better country.

Your final paragraph is good. Unless you have a length contraint, i would recommend adding a little bit more about why you admire them. Mabey go into detail about how they help the people of Indonesia.
vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Dec 23, 2015   #3
Grayta, try to make the essay more informative. As Michael said, it would be nice to learn about why you admire these two people in particular. Aside from the general knowledge that you presented, there really isn't much information about their character or accomplishments in the government that would have your reader understand why these two people should be admired.

One way of improving this essay, would be to have you explain the traits that you look for in political leaders for your country. Instead of the generic opening that you have at the moment, talk to us about your opinion about what leadership is about and the reasons why you might admire some leaders in your country. Then introduce the two people you admire, together at first. That way you establish that the essay will be covering 2 topics regarding leadership.

You could also opt to do a comparison of the two leadership styles and then compare the two leaders. Explain why even though their leadership differs in implementation, you still admire them individually. Highlight their leadership styles that you hope to emulate when your time to become a leader in your country arrives. That way you establish more than just an admiration for these people, you also imply that you too wish to become a leader, combining the best of their leadership skills, in your own leadership style in the future :-)


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