festival of Vietnam - review
Tet is the most crucial national festival of Vietnam, which usually occurs at the end of January and lasts for 3 days. Before the New Year's Eve, families will schedule to buy new something or redecorate the house. They have to expel all the bad lucks, and be ready for the arrival of a new year. During Tet, there're bunches of things that people do such as bamboo stick, pagodas for praying, giving the red envelop, visiting the relatives and so on. It's time for families and pals come together to have a feast of traditional Vietnamese dishes. Some usual staples food are boiled chicken, pig trotters, Chung cake. Chung cake is a square cake which made of sticky rice, beans, pork and Dong leaves. Trust me, it's spot on. But, wait a minute, before we can eat, first they had to be put on the family altar as offerings to our ancestors. During Tet everything is wonderful however people often mark up the price so everything gets more expensive. But anyway, I am keen on Tet because my family reunion, I can let my hair down or just simple I can sleep like a log to recharge my batteries.
There are some grammar mistakes that you should change
the New Year Eve
....because of my family reunion
In line 5 of the paragraph, you repeated the word 'Chung cake ' two times and I think you should use relative clause.
I think you shouldn't use the word ' trust me' or show your activities when you are writing the paragraph describing the holiday because it is unnecessary to do it
why do you use the past simple in this sentence " they had to be put ......." ?
And i think the structure of sentences is "it's time for sb to do sth. "
Holt Educational Consultant - / 10,531 3447
When you write about an important festival, or any festival for that matter, you have to make sure to give the reader a background regarding it. A festival normally has a religious or social importance embedded in the history, society, and culture of a people. This paper was assigned to you to help you learn how to frame important discussion topics in a manner that will be of interest to the reader. Without the history and explanation of the relevance of each activity in the presentation, you have not really written an informative paper. The reader will come away from this writing with more questions than learning about the Tet festival. I am not sure if you wrote this with a maximum word count so I cannot comment on your presentation in terms of that. However, I have to say that you must learn to write 2 ideas in one sentence, without creating a run on. You have to connect the meaning of the festival with the activities indicated. Each activity, each piece of food, the preparation, these are all key in explaining the importance of the Tet festival. So the essay isn't really as informative, creative, or effective as it could have been.