Unanswered [10] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


ielts : financial education in school - should be mandatory


vikki 3 / 5  
Sep 24, 2012   #1
Financial education should be mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
______________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________

Introducing financial education in school is essential, though some disagree on this. Many tendto understand the value of knowledge that money and asset management brings to oneself. A person with good understanding of finance and techniques to manage it would defenitely lead the race towards prosperity.

Some strongly believe that learning of finance should come through experience, not by education. Divulging into intricacies of money and wealth at young age can set a wrong moral and motivation. Children studying finance early can become more focussed on money making rather than understanding the beauty and value of money. They may expel the idea of ethics and code of conduct and just be upbeat about filling their wallets.

Nevertheless, many believe that such criticism and cyanicism about educationg children about finance and trade at school are just as usual like other. They hold onto the fact that naysayers are always around to oppose any radical thoughts and ideas. The truth that educating the value of moneyand the deligence and vigor required to earn them are very important.However, saving their hard earned moneyand spending it wisely are quint essential.

Children with better knowledge in finance and savings can transform them into succesful money managers.It would be worth to mention about Mr. Warren Buffet, a succesful investor and wealth maker. His profound knowledge and mastery on finance today was something he started practising at younger age.

In short, introducing money concepts and techniques at schools are as important as any other studies such as science, languages etc,. It has an ability to transform a society or a country.
joythblessy 86 / 272 15  
Sep 24, 2012   #2
Hai...

I am a new member in this forum..

I dodn't know how to reply..

Some suggestions..

: In the 1st para second line..
Hope it is tend to (forget space between..?)
:what do you mean by beauty of money...?

: in last para (concl) ...other studies
-> other subjects such as...

: try to avoid using 'etc'

: 3rd para last line

Is it 'quite' essential...?

Overall it was easy to read..

Keep it up..


Home / Writing Feedback / ielts : financial education in school - should be mandatory
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳