Unanswered [15] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback % width Posts: 3

IELTS 1: the first place Germans and Nigerians go to in order to access the news in a a typical week

LiemLe 1 / -  
Sep 4, 2021   #1

IELTS WRITING TASK 1: news sources in Germany

Subject: The pie charta show the first place Germans and Nigerians go to in order to access the news in a typical week.

The two given pie charts show the main sources of getting news in a typical week in two different nations, the Germans and Nigerians. The two country demonstrate the principal methods to access the current affairs, in Nigerians where TV is chosen one of people while newspaper is most popular in Germany.

One of the most significant features of data is that, while in Nigeria over two thirds of people watch news on TV, in Germany this figure is just under one third and at second place. In Germany, almost half people reading newspaper in order to reach the current affairs but it's only 13% in Nigeria and nearly at last .One major difference, the Internet is the third idea to approach from outside the world, it's 11% in Germany while it's smallest figure in Nigeria, only 1%. It suggests that the Radio is the last chose to Germans, the number of this way is only 10%, but is the second method in Nigeria, just over one fifths.

In conclusion, it can be seen that the high levels of TV and Radio use in Nigeria shows that the other methods such as Internet and Newspaper is less than in German.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 11,570 3753  
Sep 5, 2021   #2
in two different nations, the Germans and Nigerians

There are the citizens of the respective countries, not the names of the countries. The 2 pie charts refer to the citizens of the nations. This is an LR and GRA wor that will cause deductions to be applied.

In conclusion,

A task 1 essay is not concluded. 2 reporting paragraphs with a closing sentence in the last paragraph will suffice.

The writer does not use the minimum 3 paragraph presentation requirement. That would be one paragraph for each nation. This falls under a TA deduction.

[quote=LiemLe]The two country[/quote]
Countries, plural form of country. The writer must review his grammar lessons to familiarize himself with wiling rules and structures. Boulding his vocabulary and word meaning knowledge is a must as he shows severe word usage shortcomings and errors.
thien le 2 / 8 3  
Sep 6, 2021   #3
You should fix some mistakes:
1.[i]two countries
2. of the people because using expressing quantity with of, you need determiners following.
3. you should add article before newspaper. -> a newspaper is....
reading the newspaper
-> above sentence use a newspaper because you mention newspaper in the first time
4.it's the smallest figure in Nigeria ( the superlatives comparison)
5.chose => chose to-> choice for
6. this the high levels sentence is subject, so you should write show instead of shows

Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS 1: the first place Germans and Nigerians go to in order to access the news in a a typical week