Unanswered [18] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3

IELTS-Task 1: The flow chart below shows the three stages of glass bottle recycling


Leonardo Nguyen 1 / 1 1  
Jun 4, 2017   #1
The flow chart below illustrates

the three main stages of recycling glass bottle

.

At stage one, the bottles are being gathered into a collection point which then will be pick up by a truck. The truck after collect all the bottles will bring them to the cleaning plant. At stage two, the bottles in the cleaning plant will be cleanse carefully and then divided into three group: brown bottles, green bottles and clear bottle. These bottles will then be transfer to the recycling plant. In there, they are going to put into a furnace and get melt down into recycled liquid glass which will be shape into new glass bottle. At stage 3, which is the final stage, the new glass bottle will be transfer to the customer and the supermarket.

To sum up, the process could be simply describe as collect, recycle and re-use.




Holt - / 7,528 2001  
Jun 4, 2017   #2
Leonardo, this essay will automatically fail in the test because you wrote only 145 words when the minimum requirement is 150 words. The reason your essay falls short of the word requirement is because your summary overview paragraph, also known as paragraph one is incomplete. It is comprised of only one sentence when each paragraph is expected to be composed of a minimum of 3 sentences. This requirement is imposed in order to allow you to better display your English writing abilities. Writing less than that shows an inability to understand English based instructions and also, implies a weak analytical skill on your part, which is a major requirement in an IELTS test - taker. I observed the same problems in your closing statement. Work on expanding your introduction and closing presentation in your future practice essays. While you can describe the process in a single paragraph, it would be beneficial to your score if you show a higher analytical skill by dividing the paragraph into 2. Divide the procedure presentation in such a manner that allows you to increase your lexical resource and grammar accuracy scores.
OP Leonardo Nguyen 1 / 1 1  
Jun 5, 2017   #3
@Holt
thank you very much. Your feed back have proven to be extremely useful and i really appreciate that. I hope you would give me more feed back for my future post. Many thanks


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS-Task 1: The flow chart below shows the three stages of glass bottle recycling