Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


TASK 2: THE GAP BETWEEN RICH AND POOR


vnguyen248 1 / -  
Sep 28, 2022   #1
Many people say the gap between rich and poor people is wider, as rich people become richer and poor people grow poorer. What problems could this situation cause and what measures can be done to address those problems?

It is observed that the gap between rich and poor getting wider and wider, while the rich become wealthy, the needy living below poverty line. My essay will figure out potential problems trigger by this phenomenon before I suggest possible solutions to handle such a problematic issue.

First, the rich-poor gap is the cause of the increase in social prejudice. A prime example, in some hospitals, the rich are always given priority for medical care first while the poor always have to wait. Second, the disparity between rich and poor also leads to the escalating rate of crime because needy people are deprived of daily necessities.

There are several actions that could be taken to solve the problems. One of effective ways is cover basic needs for poor people because when the government can adapt daily necessities for the poor, their life will be stabilized, also crime rates will be reduced. Another measure which can be considered is create more job opportunities for impoverished people. This can improve their lives and bring long-term benefits, also boost the domestic economy.

In conclusion, rich-poor gap may be the culprit of social prejudice and the escalating rate of crime. However, this is issue can be addressed by covering basic needs and creating more job opportunities for impoverished people.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4770  
Sep 28, 2022   #2
It will be difficult for me to provide a proper assessment of the writer's opinion making abilities with this essay. That is because he has written only 215 words out of the expected 250 word minimum. In an actual test, he would have automatically received a failing score. Yes, he will be given scores for the other scoring considerations. However, deductions will be applied heavily to the word count requirement, resulting in an inability of the essay to receive a passing score. So the writer should be careful next time. Always write at least the minimum word count to make sure technical deductions are not applied.

Please note that the prompt restatement + writer's opinion paragraph is missing the discussion basis for the succeeding paragraphs. Seeing as how this test considers the ability of the writer to create proper opinion papers, as he will be required to write during his academic stay in a foreign English speaking country, he must make sure to create convincing thesis statements using the guide questions as the foundation for a strongly written writer's opinion. Without direct responses to the guide questions, the writer's opinion requirement for this paragraph will not be met and the preliminary score for the paragraph will be based on an unclear or missing opinion presentation. Knowing what the writer was asked to write about is not going to earn points. Telling the reader what he will be writing about through the response to the problems and solutions questions will gain preliminary scores.


Home / Writing Feedback / TASK 2: THE GAP BETWEEN RICH AND POOR
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳