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As global trade increases between different countries


quanking 1 / -  
May 27, 2017   #1

transporting goods over a long distance



Topic : "As global trade increases between different countries, many daily necessities are produced in other countries. Such goods are usually transported a long distance. Do the benefits of this trend outweight its drawbacks?"

Concerning the issue of global trade, people hold different views. Actually, there are both advantages and disadvantages of transporting goods over a long distance. Nonetheless, in my opinion I believe that the advantages outweight the disadvantages

On the one hand, the benefits of this phenomena are undeniable. One of them is that consumers will have chances to taste a variety of fruits and vegetables from all parts of the world and use products that can not be produved in their countries. For instance, nowadays, Vietnamese people can try kiwi and cherry due to internationl business. Additionally, enterprises of countries will expand the consuming market and the overall economy of the country can be boosted. Besides, this kind of trade will creat employment for not only local but also overseas employees. It helps in developing good relationships between countries and bring peace and stability for the world.

On the other hand, in the light of the fact that in some extent, long distance of transporting also brings several drawbacks. Firstly, without serious protecting policies, domestic products and companies can be on the verge of bankruptcy by the price and market competitiveness from foreign ones. Furthermore, when goods are transported in thousands of miles by road, sea and air, pollution will be increased owing to the toxic fumes from vehicle's engine. For these reasons, international business can be imperfect

To sum up, for what mentioned above, it can be affirmed that each view has it own merits and demerits. Thus, it is highly recommened that governments should take care of the economy of their own country.
okorobiadimma14 6 / 82 50  
May 28, 2017   #2
Peter, in the first instance, you must know that this type of write-up is an essay and not a presention, so it should not be on bullet points. That said, I will now comment on the post altogether. You did well in your sentence construction except for few typos. However, you were not able to do a proper paraphrasing of the prompt. Usually, the introductory paragraph should contain a thesis statement of what the reviwer will expect in the body of the essay. Of course, a good paraphrase of the prompt is the sure way to usher in your thesis statement. Also, you should note that the essay is opinionated, therefore you can agree or disagree and then justify why did so. You are not expected to agree and disagree at the same time. In the first paragraph, your points supported the fact that you believed that benefits outweight disadvantages, but the second paragraph says otherwise ''... increased owing to the toxic fumes from vehicle's engine. For these reasons, international business can be imperfect''. Recommendtions are not required in this essay because you just gave your opinion and others would do theirs, hence, your conclusion is not acceptable. Always try to understand the question in the prompt so as to answer correctly. I like the way you utilized transition words and phrases which means you can do better in your next practices. I can give this essay a 5.


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