Some organizations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Other value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Business development causes a competition between corporations. The famous company usually applied a rule for the employees to look more impressive in every they do work activities. However, there was an good effect of having business suit, but i believe that the value of performance in their job is most important.
Most of popular corporation has obligation for the employees to wear suit and tie along they do work. It was important because it can influence to the costumers. For instance, a teller bank. She or he have to look tidy, impressive and good looking, because if they have beautiful appearance, the transaction will be held as well. Besides, dressing smartly can attract many bank users, so it can increase the relationship opportunity among other companies.
Good looking not always become first factor to raise success in business company. I think the other causes of successful corporation, one of them is how they result a product that it has a value. For example, a programing company has more prefer to recruit workers who have many skills, because quality of human resource can influence rate of work productivity. They not need to wear tie suit. They can use every shirt that they enjoy and comfort to do their work. For example, a developer apps or programs prefer to use T-shirt, because their look is not affect to their product at all.
Superior corporations result from who person that involve it. I believe that suit smartly can influence success a company, but the quality of workers is the most significant factor that can improving a corporation productivity. So, you can wear every kind of dress that you like but it has to suit and depend on your occupant and year purpose in every your activity.
I have some ideas for your writing
(in every they do work activities) => in everything they do
(for instance, a teller bank) => a teller bank is an example
(costumers) => customers
(as well) => well
(They not need ) => they do not need
I hope that useful for you =)))
The famous company usually applied a rule for the employees to look more impressive in
every they do work activities.
==> a sentence just have 1 subject and 1 verb==> if you give 2 s and 2 verb, you should give conjunction. furthermore, you use past form in first verb "appied" which not match with "usually" and your second verb in present form.
Most of popular corporation
has obligation for the employees to wear suit and tie along WHEN they do work.
has obligation= NOT MATCH WITH = DO
... because it can influence
to the costumers TO ......
... impressive and good looking, because
if [DOUBLE CONJUNCTION] they have beautiful ...
... attract many bank users,
so it can increase ...