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Good News: The tech to change your grandma's life is already here (Summarizing)


zul2805_es 7 / 18  
Sep 26, 2016   #1
This day and age, either mine grandma or all grandparents across the globe have similar disability problem namely mobility. It is tricky for them to move from one place to another owing to their condition.

Regarding to this problem, there is some private companies which kindly help them by catering private transportation or it is commonly called paratransit. Yet, it is extremely expensive where the spending reached 12.2% of total money which spent for transportation in US a couple years ago.

However, there is a bright news which could tackle this problem. Uber, The cutting-edge technology on transportation, for example, is one of app-based that cater cheap transportation for all people and old people as well. This developing app still has to improve their quality service in order to serve them by providing a sophisticated apps special for disabilities and senior citizen.

wired.com/2016/09/ridesharing-paratransit-seniors/
akbarmappiare 31 / 469 275  
Sep 27, 2016   #2
Hi Zul..
This is my vantage point for your summary. Please, meet my notes and deal with them.

Actually, before you described contents of the origin article, you should display an introduction sentence about the resource. For example:
THIS SUMMARY IS EXTRACTED FROM AN ARTICLE PUBLISHED BY....... IN........


This day and age, either mine grandma ... It is tricky for them to move ...
(Each good paragraph has at least 3 sentences. In the next term, you have to follow that)

Regarding TURNING to this problem, there is ARE (Verb Agreement) some private companies which (...) it is commonly called AS paratransit. Yet HOWEVER (You are supposed to harness (...) where the spending reached REACHS 12.2% of THE total OF money which [i](here is omitting. You diminish "which is") spent for transportation in ...

However IN A FACT, there is a bright news which ...

Note: This is actually a good job. However, make you sure that you write is what you mind, I really believe you can improve your skill on condition that you wanna practice more and more.

Keep Fighting.
GOOD LUCK :D
mdamanhuri77 22 / 35 3  
Sep 27, 2016   #3
This daycurrently and age, either mine or grandma or all grandparents across ...
... from one place to another place owing to their condition.

Regarding to this problem, there isare some privates companies which kindly ...

This developing app still has to improveenhance their quality of service in order to (...) for disabilities and seniorelder citizen.

you need to decrease "-LY'",,it seems un-natural,,too many..
hi,,here are some advices for you,,thanks


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