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US government research expenditure- IELTS WRITTING TASK 1

Suka 1 / -  
Apr 5, 2020   #1

Funds for Health, Space, Energy, and Other 1980-2008 in the usa

The given chart illustrates how much money used by US government for Health, Space, Energy, and Other over 28 years from 1980 to 2008.
It is clear that while the expenditure for Health, Space, Energy increased, the opposite was true for the Other category over the period shown .Health always accounted for the largest share of Government Spending in each year.

In 1980, the U.S government spent approximately 8 billion dollar on Health, compared with only 2.5 billion for Energy. Four years later, the expenditure for Health witnessed a drop of 2 billion before dramatically increasing to the highest point of 21 billion in 2004, followed by decreasing to 19 billion in the last year. Meanwhile, the amount of money spent on Energy remained unchanged within 12 years before rising to 5 billion in 1996. During the rest of the period, the figure for Energy saw a slight growth to roughly 6 billion.

Look at the other category, US administration used a similar amount of money for Space and the Other at 6 billion at the staring of the research. During the research, government budget poured into Space tended to rise, finishing at just under 10 billion dollars. At the same time, the quantity for Other fluctuated throughout the period and ended at 6 billion at the end of the period.

  • chart
Ishaan7 - / 2  
Apr 5, 2020   #2
Energy, and Other over 28 ye other fields would be more appropriate.
"government spending", a little bit of unnecessary usage of capital letter.
The rest looks neat to me. Cheers.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,635 3478  
Apr 5, 2020   #3
Your review is incomplete. The graph clearly shows a blue line pertaining to information regarding General Science expenditures. You never once mentioned the figures for general science throughout your data presentation and analysis. You have to remember that you are presenting this report to an audience of scientists and economists who will have to consider all of the information as complete for their own research purposes. When you do not provide complete information, you will be misinforming them, leading to an inaccurate conclusion on their part. You have to consider what audience you are writing this essay for so that you will know exactly how to approach the information presentation, what tone to use in your writing, and what information to highlight. In this instance, you did an acceptable job although lacking in certain aspects of information dissemination.

With regards to your numerical references, a dollar is a single amount of the said currency. When you refer to 8 billion, you are referring to a plural form of the currency so dollar then becomes dollars, indicating the plural representation of the currency being mentioned. Additionally, you do not ask the reader to "look at the other category". The correct framing of the phrase is "Looking at other categories". Looking indicates an action in process, which is what you were doing when you wrote the data and "categories" signifies the plural number of sections within the graph. You seem to have a problem with referring to the singular and plural forms of words. You need to brush up on the rules pertaining to that and also, try to familiarize yourself with the plural form of basic everyday words that could be useful in your future writing.
Apr 5, 2020   #4
In the IELTS task 1 you MUST NOT give your opinion ideas like "the opposite was true for ..."

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