Topic: Many people think that the government should spend money to explore life in the outer space, while others think that it's a waste of public money. Discuss both views and include your own opinion and examples.
space development spendings
From the day Wright brothers created the very first airplane to date, aerospace industries have subjected to many changes. These changes together with the advancement in technology have enabled us to manufacture advanced aircrafts and travel to other planets for discovering life. Some people, however, believe that discovering other planets are not in priority and we need to focus on more important issues. Thus, this essay aims to address the viewpoints of with and against the idea of traveling to outer-space.
[...]I don't think that the Wright Brothers are the correct reference for your opening statement. You should perhaps look into the government point of view regarding space exploration at the moment and open with a line that explains the reasons why the Obama government has cut back on space development spending. Remember, the Wright Brothers created the airplane, but the U.S. government won the space race against Russia. Your essay should look into the economic aspect of supporting space exploration and the fact that there are people such as Sir Richard Branson and Elon Musk who have recently started the trend of private space exploration, space tourism, and the like. Private space exploration companies have begun to take up the cudgels for future space related activities so in that sense, would it still be logical for the government to continue spending on space projects? Try to write the essay from that point of view in order to properly align it with the prompt requirements.
I rewrote the essay again and in one part of my discussion I also used your ideas. Still not sure if I could write it well. To be honest I don't like what I wrote:
I sense the stress that you were under while revising this essay. It is quite evident in the way that your thoughts and method of expressing yourself ends up getting confused and lost in your paragraphs. Tell you what. Just so you won't have to fret so much about this paper, I'd like to offer you my take on this essay. Let me show you an example of how it can be written in a better manner and then you can use that as a example for your next revision.
Prompt: Many people think that the government should spend money to explore life in the outer space, while others think that it's a waste of public money. Discuss both views and include your own opinion and examples.
When the United States and Russia first began the space race, it was in an effort to gain the prestige of being the first country to travel in space, conquer the moon, and see the earth from above. After that, the two countries somehow managed to work together to create an international space station where even China now has their own astronauts floating about in space with his other country counterparts, all engaged in the study of space. The problem is that as the technology and new discoveries are made to further conquer outer space, the projects are also getting more and more expensive to fund. Which is one reason why the Obama administration has cut back on the NASA budget and has piggbacked rides on Chinese rockets to get their necessary equipment to the space station instead. Obviously the president of the United States thinks the same as other people, that money spent on space projects is a waste of tax money. I am of the same opinion as the others when it comes to this case. However, this essay is not just about my opinion. So, let's take a balanced look at all sides of the issue which will hopefully help the reader come to his own educated conclusion on the matter.
The government that spends on a space project does so using a limited budget, taken from the tax payer money. That means that this funding could have been allocated to more important citizen supporting projects had it not been allocated for space research. That is one reason that the public tends to frown upon the use of the tax funds on space projects. While the space research helps us learn more about the universe we live in, we don't really benefit directly from this new found information. If given an opportunity to have a bigger budget, maybe the government space projects could eventually benefit the public. However, that is and will never be the case as the government needs to spend and maintain more public responsible projects.
Private entities such as Virgin Space which is owned by Sir Richard Branson of England and and South African born - Canadian billionaire Elon Musk's Spacex are two of the major players in the private space exploration field that has proven to develop a more usable business plan for space exploration. Branson has developed space tourism using his own space ships, while Musk has developed business ideas for private space exploration and mining for business use. Both men have invested billions of dollars into this field of space exploration and research that individual country governments simply cannot compete with.
Just looking at the way that these two men, business leaders and founding fathers of 21st century space exploration in their own ways, are spending billions of dollars hand over fist, it is sufficient to say that no government agency will be able to compete with them. While we will forever be thankful to government space projects for laying the successful foundation for space research and projects, the reality of the situation is that the government cannot finance space exploration the way it needs to be founded in modern times. As such, we must admit that they should pull back on funding research projects. Pull back, but not stop spending.
The only way to ensure that private space entities do not abuse the opportunity offered to them by their ability to undertake private space exploration, is to make sure that the government can at least continue to partner with them on a limited basis. This will ensure that no abuse of outer space discovered minerals or technological developments will be abused in the name of private interests. Limited government spending on space projects is vital to the continued development of government supervised space projects until such a time that these private companies can be trusted to not abuse their ability to create a better universe for the benefit of the earth residents.
In conclusion, it is sufficient to say that government spending should be scaled back on space projects, private entities need to be supervised in their exploration activities by government agencies through financed partnerships, and I believe that we will all benefit from the mutual partnership and interests of the government and private space development groups.
I wrote the above from the top of my head. I hope it helps you out :-)
wow, Luisa I am speechless of what you've done for me. You wrote a perfect essay and spent your valuable time merely to help me. Thank you very much.
While I was writing the essay both my ideas and yours were mixed, and time was running. I do my best, even though the essays I wrote through last two days were disappointing. I have only 3 months to bring up my writing skills and this is almost impossible. But at least I can try. Fingers crossed.
Thanks again for your help :)
Just relax and keep your head above you. I will assist you as best as I can over the coming months through this forum. Right now, I want you to concentrate on reading more current events and casual reading materials. Then write essays based upon what you understood of the reading material. Develop your own prompts if you have to and answer them. Be casual about your practice tests. Don't stick to the IELTS review material if it will stress you out. Write about things that you know you can write. You already have an idea of the IELTS type of essay prompts you will be expected to write about.Try to base your personal practice prompts upon those. What is important is that you practice your English reading and comprehension skills in order to help you develop your essay writing prowess :-)
