Some Governments and Businesses prohibit smoking.Do you agree or disagree

Hi
i am preparing for ielts.
could you please give me the band score for this essay.

Some businesses prohibit smoking in any of their offices. Some governments have banned smoking in all public places. Do you agree or disagree that this is the right course of action? Give reasons for your opinion.

Smoking is very famous and fashionable habit in many countries. In modern era, some governments and businesses prohibit smoking in public places and offices. Some people think that people should have the right to decide about their smoking habit, while I believe that it is very dangerous and harmful habit.

Cigarettes have almost fifty different types of chemical components in their composition, so this habit is seriously injurious to health and it leads to cancer disease .The recent British survey shows that 70% of the cancer people diseased and killed in every year because of their smoking habit. Moreover, smoking is not only effects the smokers health, but also non smokers and it decreases the life span of both smokers and non smokers.

In addition to that, smoking is easily spreadable habit and people can easily addict to this habit. The people who are already having this behavior in schools, colleges and work places they are trying to motivate their friends and colleagues and some are easily fond to this habit. So the Governments and Businesses should at least try to control this habit by prohibit it in public places and offices.

All in all, some people think that smoking habit is completely depends on their own decision, but my suggestion is that it is seriously injurious to both smokers and non-smokers health so I supported the decision that is taken by some governments and businesses and I think it is right course of action to controlling the smoking habit.

thank you in advance.

Smoking is very popular habit in many countries.

This is better than using "famous", i think

Smoking is quite a popular trend among people world over.


Some people think that people should have the right to decide about their smoking habit, whilehowever, I believe that it is very dangerous and harmful habit.


... This is what you call passive smoking. The people who do not smoke as a habit also inhale a certain percentage of harmful smoke and become passive smokers.

...and it leads to one of the most fatal diseases- cancer. Instead of "and it leads to cancer disease"
"In addition....that habit" you can say instead that "smoking is prevailing than ever before and unfortunately, once a person starts, it is "mission impossible" to end this abasing habit."

can i write many of us believe instead of i believe in introduction