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IELTS - there is a great gap in between the living standards of the people of cities and villages


somysojan 8 / 19 8  
Feb 5, 2013   #1
Question: Living standards in cities are much higher than those in rural areas. Why do you think this is so? What do you propose to improve the living standards of people in rural areas?

Cities are large and densely populated area, whereas villages are rustic and focus on only on agriculture. The standard of living in the urban region is much better and complicated than it is there in countryside. This essay focuses on the reasons for this statement and also the possible measures to amend the lifestyles of the agrarian life.

The main reason for the good standard of living in the metropolis is the effect of the inter-mixing of multi-cultural communities. A city is a combination of both aboriginal and alien cultures, which causes the adaptation of many good lifestyles among the dwellers. Moreover, the urban area comprises of many good educational institutions, well-developed communication facilities, which are also instrumental in the betterment of the living standards.

However, rural communities are mainly relay on agriculture as a means of livelihood than on any business or co-operate jobs. So the scene of living standard in this folksy culture is just opposite to what we see in an urban life.

By implementing several measures, the rural standards can be improved. Establishing basic educational facilities for the children in the villages helps a lot. For instance, many villages in India still suffer from illiteracy due to the lack of elementary educational institutions. So literacy plays a major role in developing a well-standard community in countryside. In addition to that, the accessibility of communication facilities and media, such as television, newspaper and the internet are also highly backing in terms of improving the living standards.

From the above statements, it is clear that there is a great gap in between the living standards of the people of cities and villages. So it is crucial to provide essential concerns on the development of rural culture in order to develop the whole nation.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Feb 5, 2013   #2
Cities are large and densely populated areas , whereas villages are rusticrural and focus on only on agriculture.

city refers to area/ cities refer to areas

The standard of living in the urban regionareas is much better and complicated than it is therethat in countryside.

.... pay attention to the grammar corrections I made

This essay focuses on the reasons for this statement and also the possible measures to amend the lifestyles of the agrarian life.

My suggestion;
In my view there are various reasons for this difference of living standards. This essay is focused on discussing those issues and proposing measures that can help improve living standards of rural areas.

The main reason for the good standard of living in the metropolis is the effect of the inter-mixing of multi-cultural communities.

....first, "inter-mixing" does not sound a proper usage. Also, I cannot agree with this idea as a reason for people to having higher living standards in the cities. There are many more important reasons like advanced infrastructure (roads, hospitals, schools, railway etc.), more educated people, better employment opportunities etc.
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Feb 5, 2013   #3
The main reason for the good standard of living in the metropolis is the effect of the inter-mixing of multi-cultural communities.

The main reason for high standards of living in urbanized areas is the existence of a multi-cultural society.
I don't quite agree with this statement however. There are great cities that are not so multi cultured.

Moreover, the urban area comprises of many good educational institutions, well-developed communication facilities, which are also instrumental in the betterment of the living standards.

Also, an urban area comprises of good educational institutions, well developed communication facilities and very a good health care system which are instrumental in high class living.

From the above statements, it is clear that there is a great gap in between the living standards of the people of cities and villages.

Therefore, it is clear that there is a great gap between the living standards of cities and villages.

You need to focus on your grammar.
devabe2005 46 / 97  
Feb 6, 2013   #4
focus on only on agriculture. --> focus only on agriculture.

complicated than it is there in countryside. --> complicated than in countryside. --> make it short as you are expanding which result in meaningless sentence


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