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Happiness directly relates to economic success


polsestart 2 / 4  
Oct 16, 2012   #1
it is undeniable that happiness directly relates to economic success nowadays.From my point of view, the success of economy plays an important role in happiness of each other for may reasons.Firstly, having a fair finance,people can spend their money comfortably without worrying about any problems.They will be happier if they can buy something that is necessary for their life.Secondly,especially ina famiy,if your mother or father earns much money,it means that your family is able to afford essential things such as personal means of transport, family equipment,a lot of fees..etc.so the life of your family will be happier.Where as many people think that without the economic success,people still find their happiness.It is partially true because people can not only find their happiness in facilities but in spiritual life.But when put into the situation of the poor,you will realize that they have to face many problem with a large mumber of work,and most show their tireness.Therefore,they hardly find their real happiness.In addition, families in which there is no economic success,the argument between the parents and other members is unavoidable.In short,happiness can be affected by many factors,but it directly relates to the success of economy.

OP polsestart 2 / 4  
Oct 16, 2012   #2
i need your comments on my essay "money directly relates to economic success".i apppreciate it very much,guys!thank you!
Jennyflower81 - / 690 96  
Oct 16, 2012   #3
it is undeniable that happiness directly relates to economic success nowadays.
Maybe say it like this: "It is obvious that a person's happiness is related to their economy."

From my point of view, the success of economy plays an important role in happiness of each other for may reasons.
Or you could say: In my opinion, there are many reasons why the economy plays an important role in an individual's sense of fulfillment."

Firstly, having a fair finance,people can spend their money comfortably without worrying about any problems.
Don't use "firstly, secondly, etc." These are unnecessary. I would try to be more clear about your reasons for the economy relating to people's happiness. "having fair finance" does not really mean anything-- use some really good examples, like 1) affordable access to goods and supplies 2) access to a proper education 3) available jobs that pay enough money to meet basic needs 4) access to healthcare
OP polsestart 2 / 4  
Oct 16, 2012   #4
Jenny,thanks very much for your comment.
i think i need to insert some transitional word such as " firstly,secondly...etc" to make the paper more smoothly.
Anyway,i find that your example about the economic success is very useful.


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