IELTS TASK 2 ABOUT HEALTH

It is true that the consumption of healthy food has played a vital role. Therefore some of the population believe that governments should enact laws about people's nutrition. While others think that it is personal preferences.

On the one hand, the ideal of making policy is attractive for several reasons. The first reason for this is increasing life expectancy. This is mainly due to the fact that numerous people have been living a sedental lifestyles and unhealthy diets. Another reason is reduce risk of chronic diseases such as diabetes, obesity particularly in children. For example, according to a recent study surveyed by Cambrighe university, the ratio of obesity in juventile is 78% in Amercan . This is because of the excessive consumption of snack food as well as drinks such as hamburges, coca cola.

On the other hand, despite the above-mentioned advantages, I believe that the option depend on people's choice. The main one is various people have different tastes. This can explained by the fact that some people were born with genetic disorders which can not eat certain foods. Moreover, it is right for citizens being access their physical and metal health. For instance, a large number of people have a sense of contentment, happiness when consumed sweet candy or dessert, especially after a long intensive hours of working.

In conclusion, while there are some compelling benefits regarding to enact laws about human's nutrition, I still believe that should rely on personal preferences. It is advisable that government can enact strictly laws about food's hygiene.

3 problems with this opening sentence. First, it is stating a personal opinion of the writer instead of the topic representation. Second, the sentence is incomplete in thought / idea presentation. The subject of the sentence is healthy food. What is the predicate for the vital role? See the problem? Third, the writer seems to be required by the writing guide to provide his own opinion in this section. Where is it? This is a compare and contrast 3 points of view essay format.

As for the discussion itself, the writer will definitely receive a failing LR score because he misspells English words and does not know the meaning of the word well enough to use it properly in the sentence / paragraph. He does not effectively explain his reasons and also does not seem to understand the reasons well enough to use it.

Missing from the presentation are the GRA pronoun requirements to show that the 3 points of view are being discussed. This also led to the incorrect discussion format since the 2 public opinions are not completely discussed. It jumped from a public discussion to a personal one in the next paragraph. Therefore, the essay does not meet the discussion format requirements. It is not going to receive a passing score based on these mistakes alone.