Essay about healthy life in children

Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle Both schools and parents are responsible for solving this problem

To what extent do you agree with this statement

Nowadays, children tend to have an unhealthy life than in the past. In my opinion, I believe that because of the fast speed development of social technology which tempts most children away from their healthy lifestyle. And to me, parents and school might play a critical role in forming their children's lifestyles.

Parents now are much busier than in the past. So, they rarely care about their children while they are the one who directly influences them and knows that they could remedy this situation. Instead of spending time playing healthy activities with their kids, they give them a phone to watch. Therefore, parents should spend their time and limit the time that children spend sitting down and should encourage them to take more exercise outside in the fresh air. For instance, the father could spend time playing sports with them at the weekend, and the mother could teach them how to take a balanced diet by providing a range of foods which include plenty of vegetables and fruit and only small amounts of fat. In this way, the kids learn to be responsible for eating habits and develop their physical

School also plays an essential role because this is almost the second house in which their children absorb a large amount of knowledge. So, their place should be clean, and the teachers need to teach them the importance of a healthy life. In another way, schools also should provide them with regular exercise in their timetables, with activities such as physical education and compulsory sports.

On the other hand, I think that governments and health authorities have a responsibility to teach people how to create a healthy lifestyle for children. This can be done, for example, by broadcasting programs about healthy eating on television, or by giving courses to new parents on how to bring up their children.

In conclusion, I believe that parents and school, and governments are the main elements in children's lifestyle.

Are you sure you used a timer when you wrote this essay? You have 326 words, the essay is too long to write in 40 minutes if you aim to keep the presentation errors free. You also do not prove that you can quickly explain yourself, clearly in the English language. That is why there is a 3-5 sentence limit in every paragraph presentation. You also fell into the trap of using a conjunction at the start of the sentence, which will lower your GRA score. More importantly, and this error could actually prevent you from getting a passing score, you failed to respond to the direct question in the original prompt. Where is the "extent" response? There isn't any.

Question: To what extent do you agree with this statement
Response: In my opinion, I believe that because of the fast speed development of social technology which tempts most children away from their healthy lifestyle. And to me, parents and school might play a critical role in forming their children's lifestyles.

Your opinion needs to be presented as a measured response such as "I disagree with this statement to the extent that both parents and schools play a critical role..." The on the other hand discussion is not required. It is not related to an extent response. You also need to avoid words of uncertainty that could make your opinion confusing or unclear to the examiner. phrases such as "might play" creates uncertainty and confusion for the reader. Might is an uncertain word and should not appear in a clearly written academic essay. The same goes for "In my opinion...". Saying "I believe" creates more clarity for the presented discussion.

Having reviewed the overall essay, I can tell you that you have not presented the essay in the required format. Therefore, there is a distinct possibility that this essay may not get a passing score.