Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback % width Posts: 5

Nowadays, many high school graduates opt for a gap year instead of continuing higher education

linhngan118 1 / 2  
Jul 30, 2020   #1

advantages and disadvantages of taking a gap year

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Nowadays, many high school graduates opt for a gap year instead of continuing higher education right away. For many, a year off offers them more time to prepare for university and find the suitable field they want to pursue. However, others argue that a year out may result in being left behind and is a waste of time. In this essay, I will discuss the opportunities it offers as well as challenges students have to face with.

Let's start by looking at the advantage of a drop year. One of the main benefits graduates gain from a gap year is that they have more time to make thorough preparation for university, especially students want to study abroad and hunt for scholarship. They can spend a year long participating in community projects, taking international certificates and improving their CVs and essay. In fact, many students taking a gap year have been awarded a full-ride scholarship. Another significant advantage is that when taking a break from school, a teenager can broaden his/her real-life experience; therefore, they know what career is apt for themselves and are able to make the most suitable choice for the field they want to pursue in college, compared to many who don't know what to study in university and just pick one randomly.

Turning to the other side of the argument, one of the biggest obstacles to be overcome is being left behind and starting later. In many cases, the students taking a gap year may still study at campus while their peers have already got a job or promotion. Another major drawback is that a spare year may become a waste year if we don't meticulously plan work beforehand which can result in profound regret later on. Therefore, it becomes harder to continue studying or get a job if you don't attend any special activities or sharpen your skills during the year.

In conclusion, while it is very wonderful to have a year off after having studied for 12 years successively, this time can also pose considerable risks if we are not ready for it.

kaisergod47 2 / 3 2  
Jul 30, 2020   #2
In general, I think your essay is quite good. However, there are some minor mistakes that need correcting:
_ Do not use abbreviation ( Let's -> Let us )
_ I think the phrase should be " especially students WHO want to study ...", so that it makes more sense.

_ Some of the words are repeated in the 2nd paragraph(students , advantage -> merit)
Anyway, you did a great job! Go on with the hard work and better your skills!
Harry Nguyen 1 / 3  
Jul 31, 2020   #3
Please read my comments
Firstly, please do not use abbreviation in writing (Let's - let us)
Secondly, you use limitted linking words such as however, in addition, in terms of,,,
You should vary grammatical range by using condition sentences, the inversion sentences to impress your opinion...
It would be better if you make use of collocation verbs
Holt [Contributor] - / 9,025 2715  
Jul 31, 2020   #4
When you write the paraphrase, do not include information that is not included in the original prompt. I understand that those are the reasons you will be discussing in the reasoning paragraphs. However, you are scored on the accuracy of your restatement so it is best for you to state the reasons at the end of the paraphrase instead. That is where the outline goes in this presentation.

You should limit your presentation to no more than 290 words. With 40 minutes to write the essay, and knowing that the score will be based on quality and accuracy rather than length, you are not helping yourself by over writing in the essay. There are errors in the GRA section that you could jave corrected if you focused on the proper scoring requirements for the essay.

Do not use words and English phrases if you are not familiar w I think it. The term is gap year, not drop year.

The conclusion is incomplete in formatting. This is a 3-5 sentence presentation. You dk not have a proper recap of the prompt and discussion requirements.
OP linhngan118 1 / 2  
Jul 31, 2020   #5
thank you guys so much for spending time reading and giving feedback to my essay. I really appreciate all your comments and thanks to them I got to see my mistake


Home / Writing Feedback / Nowadays, many high school graduates opt for a gap year instead of continuing higher education