Hiring jobless people develop their living standards, give practical skills and integrate in society

Task2 - Unemployed people should be made to work

The most significant number of unemployed people in the world was caused by a large number of reasons. While it is believed that making people without job to be employee will allow the low-salary as a cheap labor, i would agree that the merits such as building their skill and raise their financial support should be concerned to improve their standard living.

To begin with, the highest population without involving their large number of productive inhabitant, will cause a lot of problems for their city development. The city will not able to enhance their financial budget, if their dwellers and occupants cannot endorse the improvement of their city's economic wheel. Furthermore the people who gain the job have much more opportunities to build up their skills such as be an expert in some field. In addition, they have a good chance to repair their financial condition constructively. Obviously, as time goes on they also able to have a great achievement from their society.

Apart from the previous discussion, the unemployed people who able to become employee usually obtain a humble payment in the beginning career. Their obstacles to get much money in a short time is faced frequently. Absolutely, they should be more patient to increase their career and keep in mind their responsibility for doing their work.

To sum up, people who life without job seem a crum in their society. Making unemployed people as employees allow them to develop their living standards which also build up their practice skills and support their economical goverment

Hi Mekar, it is rather silly to comment your essay without seeing the question as this will lead the difficulty experienced by the readers. I hope you will be more concerned when uploading your next writing. When it comes to your essay issue, I found several aspects needed to improve in your writing and hard work and strong passion coming from you, of course, are extremely required. The most striking issue related to your essay is coherence. I think you need to notice the logical link between one sentence and its followings. Taking the introduction in first and second sentence as an example. if we look back these sentences are not well logical order and therefore make the reader confused. Another problem highlighted in your essay is about collocation. Some words you use in your writing are not colloquial: financial condition (it is supposed to be issues) and so on.

I hope you can expose yourself to English writing by reading more English articles and try to imitate the writer did.