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History has become a core subject at high school. However, some say it should be an optional subject


anh123456 1 / -  
Oct 9, 2022   #1

history as a mandatory subject



Education is always considered as a fundamental formation to everyone to develop themselves in the future. Therefore, it is hotly-debated topic that divided several different views. Recently, history has become a compulsory subject at high school; however, some stick to the idea that students should spend mostly time on learning natural subjects such as maths, physics. In my opinion, I think that history is a mandatory subject is a right decision

To commence with, thanks to this decision of ministry of education it helps each student in Vietnam be aware of the importance of history. From that they will have the right attitude to this subject. Besides, others often feel bored and say that history does not help them anything in the future, thus owing to becoming a core subject, it makes change their mind and gradually respect this subject more.

Furthermore, that learning history as an important subject at school also help students have a huge broad of knowledge about it. After accumulating these lessons about history in the classroom, students can comprehend deeply what ancestors sacrificed to protect the country's independence and create a peaceful life as now. As a result, they will try their best to study well and have an optimistic outlook to their living. These devotion of the former generation is a endless resource of motivation to fulfill themselves better. Moreover, history also bring them enormous precious experiences and meaningful lessons in order to avoid the same situations in the past.

In conclusion, it is logical when history is announced to be a mandatory subject . Being a senior at high school, I am trying to learn history well in particular and other subject in general to deserve with what people in the past did.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,568 4443  
Oct 10, 2022   #2
The first 2 sentences in the prompt restatement could cause the paragraph to receive a failing score due to the discussion deviation that the thoughts presented. These are no doubt the personal opinion of the writer and as such, should not be included in the prompt restatement. It could be used to present his personal opinion, but it cannot be used as a part of the topic restatement since it does not relate to the actual discussion topic. Education is not the focal point of the essay. The subjects taught in school are the target of the discussion. Those are 2 different topics for discussion. Focus on the one related to the original presentation.

thanks to this decision of ministry of education it helps each student in Vietnam

The writer has created a country focused discussion which is not the expected response format for this essay. The writer's opinion must be presented in a general manner that can apply to any country in the world. He cannot focus specifically on his home country because there is no specific country given in the discussion. Also, the reference to the country, but not a personal experience of the writer tends to disqualify this as an example. Had he related the decision to his own learning process, then the given paragraph would have better met the writing requirements.

help students

There is a disconnection between the previous reasoning paragraph and the second reasoning paragraph. That is because the first reason focuses on Vietnam alone while the second paragraph uses the general (worldwide) reference instead. Hence the lack of cohesiveness between the paragraph presentations for the public opinion discussion.

Being a senior at high school, I am trying to learn history well

This explanation is not acceptable as a part of the concluding summary. This is a personal opinion presentation and therefore, should be the 3rd paragraph of the essay. This needs to be more properly and fully developed in order to receive a proper scoring consideration in relation to the public opinion paragraphs.

The essay was concluded without the proper reverse paraphrase presentation. So the examiner will see this as an open ended essay. He will score down the task accuracy of this essay, leading to a failing score based on 2 reasons:

1. The inclusion of an irrelevant reference leading to a topic deviation in the prompt paraphrase
2. The lack of a proper summarized discussion point presentation and topic restatement in the concluding summary

These are but a few of several errors in this presentation in relation to the scoring considerations that could hinder the ability of the writer to reach an overall passing score consideration.


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