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A history of India's independence


Jawa 11 / 17 1  
Sep 19, 2016   #1
A history of India's independence

A colonization in many countries leads to any human problems. There was no exception for India which had to be struggle to obtain an independence. On December 1961, Nehru ordered Indian troops marched into Goa to liberate it from Portuguese who had powerfully ruled the territory since 1510. Over 3500 Portuguese soldiers were overrun by over 30.000 troops in a brisk operation. Due to this circumstance, some countries addressed a stark critic to India and stated that India had lost the morality.

On the other hand, some others pointed out that the military adventure in Goa was totally becoming an expostulation from the increasing Chinese border incursions. After the invasion, Nehru took a place immediately in the election campaign who was able to strike a patriotic cord on restoring Goa to Motherland. His win, then, in the general election brought him back in power for a third successive term. With his power, finally, Nehru and his defense minister had taken steps to reclaim from the Chinese some territory by setting up forward posts.

rizaldohabibie 19 / 35  
Sep 19, 2016   #2
hi..
it is a quite good essay..
here some thoughts..

leads to m any human problems
>> misspelling

had to be struggle
>> just directly put the verb (struggle) after had to

thanks..
eve01 24 / 40 5  
Sep 19, 2016   #3
hi there ^^
i would like to give u some notes
i hope it will helps ^^

>>>mark your punctuation >>>the territory since 1510. .

>>>Due to this circumstance , in this sentence i did not find the subject >>> it dues to this circumstance
some countries addressed a stark critic to India and stated that India had been lost the morality.
>>> giving conjunction
>>>And Over 3500 Portuguese soldiers were overrun
zian41 1 / 4  
Sep 19, 2016   #4
hai there, let me give some correction for you ..

A colonization in many countries leads (use lead because plural) to any human problems.
There was no exception for India which had to be struggle ( use past participle because passive voice) to obtain an independence
RAY93 35 / 186 136  
Sep 20, 2016   #5
..... countries leads to any humanity problems/

.... to obtain an independence[instead of this, you may write 'a freedom/liberty. etc']

.... Nehru ordered Indian troops = who is Nehru? you need to explain it more or give additional information related to his/her background as his/her story is not a factual neither a common shared issue

..... it from Portuguese who had powerfully = which

... military adventure in Goa was totally becoming an expostulation from the increasing of Chinese border incursions.
... the election campaign whoas a figure that was able to strike a ...
With his power it, finally, Nehru (...) taken steps to reclaim from the Chinese some territory by setting up forward posts. = confusing

instead of some grammatical errors, it is evidence that you have such adequate skill in writing. keep writing and improving your works. still, you can revise and enhance it. good luck
FirmanRomadhon20 9 / 15  
Sep 22, 2016   #6
Hello Jawa, I have little notes for you:
There was noThis was not exception for India which had ...

..., Nehru ordered Indian troops marchedmarching into Goa to (...) who had powerfully ruledthe territory since 1510.

some otherspeople (you can use other, the others and so on when some things have been explained before the word to explain other, the other and so on pointed out that the military ...

I hope It will help


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