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My Holiday (quick weekend) essay


johnnynguyen 1 / 2  
Sep 4, 2013   #1
Hi. I'm Johnny Nguyen and I'm new to website. I'm trying to improve my English as much as possible. I was asked to write about the last weekend which was the Labour day i think.

If i make any mistake. Please correct it for me. Thank you!

Last weekend passed so quick with me. I spent most of the time to work at the restaurant in summer. There was a few things to worry about before school start such as new clothes, material and equipment. On Saturday, I got on the bus with some friends to Metrotown for shopping with 200 dollars in my pocket. I was kind of worried about spent enough for necessary stuffs. I got two jeans and three t-shirt. My friends suggested that I look cool in those. Then we went around stores to find a barber shop to get my haircut done. It's even harder to find a Chinese restaurant shopping mall so we went to McDonald instead. As the sun set was the time I arrived home to get ready for tomorrow. My best friend texted me to ask about school just before I fell sleep. On Sunday was the busy day, I woke up early as usual and waited for the bus with the same feelings. I arrived the restaurant half hour later like I expected. The boss wasn't there until lunch to I just started to fill the soups and food supplies. I kept my mind busy that I can't think about repeated ESL level 3. What a sad thing for me. Sometime it was like a flash back that make me feel even more disappointed. I finished off Sunday went home for FA dinner. I would like to call it FA because I cooked, ate and cleaned up alone.

ldlsky03 8 / 16 2  
Sep 5, 2013   #2
before school start

starts

spent

spending

to I just started

when I just started
April April 13 / 148 22  
Sep 5, 2013   #3
I spent most of the time to working at thea restaurant

("restaurant" is not definite so you must use "a")

There waswere a few things to worry abouttake care of

("worry about" doesn't make much sense in this sentence)

I was kind of worried

--> "kind of" is spoken language so I don't think you should use it in a piece of writing.

I gotbought two jeans and three t-shirts .

--> again, "got" is quite colloquial, so you should use "bought" instead.

It'sIt was even harder to find

--> you are writing about something in the past, so use past tense in all your sentences.

You should really work on your grammar if you want to improve your writing.

Best
OP johnnynguyen 1 / 2  
Sep 6, 2013   #5
so instead of (kind of) what else should i use? April April?
dumi 1 / 6,948 1592  
Sep 13, 2013   #6
Last weekend passed so quick with me

The last weekend passed by too quickly for me.

There waswere a few things to worry about before school start such as new clothes, material and equipment.

There were a few things - "were" refers to "few things" which is plural
I gotbought two jeans and three t-shirts .... one shirt/ three shirts

As the sun set was the time I arrived home to get ready for tomorrow.

As the sun set, I arrived home and got ready for the next day's work.


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