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The human have a negative effect on our planet. By harming Earth, we put our lives in danger.

anakosola 1 / 2 1  
Sep 21, 2018   #1

Earth is being harmed by human activity

Some people believe that the Earth is being harmed by human activity. Others feel that human activity makes the Earth a better place to live.

this thesis is one of the most well-known ones, but anyway i wanted to write something about it.

I am of the opinion that humanity has had a negative effect on the planet.
The quailty of human life has improved over the past years, but Earth is being damaged more and more by human activity. Meanwhile we develop technology, we use natural resources. with some types of of transport and factories we poluute environment and besides, destroy natural areas.

To begin with, industrial development has caused major air pollution, which has a terrible effect on person's health ( for example: it increases chronic lung deseases) also human evolution has led to accumulation of trash, which spoils the beauty of the planet. Over and above, water is beint contiminated, which causes high risk of poisoning.

Secondly, people act as if we had unlimited natural resources. Everyday we get oil, petrol from Earth and cut down trees. Earth is likely to human, if we bleed all the time we die. So we should utilize Earth's resources rationally.

As urban populations grow, the cities expand too, taking over more and more land. On the land, that were once forests, resorts or just green territory, are now bulit houses offices, stores and some other kind of buildings.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that human activity is causing the world changes at a rapid pace. By harming Earth, we put our lives in danger
terminal28 4 / 20 5  
Sep 21, 2018   #2
Always begin a sentence with a Capital letter (line 1)
i is always written as "I"
How about "This theory is a popular one that I would like to lend my voice to"?
Please restructure your third and fourth sentences
"human evolution has led to accumulation of trash" How so?
Can you find another way to conclude other than saying "in conclusion"?
OP anakosola 1 / 2 1  
Sep 21, 2018   #3
thank you for your advice. i am new in this forum so i' m trying to improve writing skills.
You are welcome. I see that you really have a habit of not beginning a sentence with a capital letter :-) Hopefully you will break that bad habit.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,667 3487  
Sep 22, 2018   #4
Ana, regardless of the information and review that you received above, your essay will still get a failing score automatically. It is not because of the errors in your sentence structures or the discussion of the essay that caused this automatic negative score. It is the fact that you wrote less than the minimum amount of words. You wrote only 224 words when the minimum is 250 words. In a real test scenario, you won't even get the reviewer to read your essay, he is going to count the words first. Anything below the minimum and he won't even bother to read the essay. You will receive points deductions for the number of missing words in the essay and then be scored again with points deducted for the remainder of the errors based on the scoring criteria. Therefore, this essay will not have any chance of passing. Please remember to write the minimum of 250 words the next time you write a practice essay test.

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