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Toefl ibt: Zoos are useful or not?zoos are advantageous to both human and animals

Coolmam9x 4 / 6  
May 19, 2011   #1
Task: Some people believe that zoos serve useful functions. Other people believe that it is cruel and wrong to confine animals in zoos. Tell which point of view you agree with and explain why, using specific details and reasons.

I can't deny that in my childhood, one of my most exciting activity was to visit the zoo. I always love animals, and I wants to be friends with all kinds of animals. However, I live in a modern city, which does not allow me to spot even a bird. Therefore, zoos are somewhere very meaningful to me. Although many people think that it is cruel and meaningless to put animals in cages, I myself believe that zoos have performed useful functions.

Let's say that you ask your children to go to the zoo, they will definitely agree with that idea. Indeed, zoos are one of the most entertaining and educational place for children and even adults. Almost all of children love to see and play with animals; that's why they desire to have pets and see movies about wild creatures. But in this rapidly modernizing world, chances for children in cities to experience the wild life have lessened a lot. That's where zoos appear. They quench the thirst of children for discovering new things about the wild world that they do not experience in daily life. Children may watch and learn about the animals in classes or on the Internet, but the best way to learn this kind of knowledge is to experience it directly. To the adults, zoos are somewhere that they can find themselves relaxed and younger. I went to the zoo a lot when I was only a little boy, and I became familiar with all of the animals in the city zoo. However, when I am already an adult having a stable job, I still go to the zoo. I belive not only me but also other people find the zoo the place to reduce tress after hardworking hours.

Zoos are not only for the benefit of human but also for animals. Nowadays, there are more and more kinds of animals being threatened and being on the verge of disappearing on the Earth. Now, some species are only found in the zoos. If there were not such places for endangered animals, they would never been seen again. Zoos also help animals to live a better life and reproduce faster. Many endangered animals are being preserved in zoological gardens such as panda and South East Asian tiger. These species have a safe environment to grow and reproduce, and then they will be sent back to the nature. Furthermore, in zoos, animals won't have to worry about hunters, disforestration, or disasters. Zoos are places for animals.

All in all, zoos are advantageous to both human and animals; they provide entertaining, educational, relaxing places for people and safe, secure, nourishing environment for animals. In the future, I think, more zoos should be built and the conditions in zoos ought to be bettered, so that we can somehow help preserve the disappearing animals.
mywill 4 / 10  
May 19, 2011   #2
-TOEFL ibt writing requires more skills than any else tests and the most important is that you should write shortly but aptly because you know, you have to read up on your stuff and correct the mistakes.

- For this kind of task, I suggest you write a balanced essay because this way can help you strike the high scores of writing, I mean independent task.

- Try to give some phrases to show the contrast between the concepts. You should have an ending or conclusion too.

Nice to meet all
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
May 20, 2011   #3
Hi cool boy, you write well!

I think you'll have no trouble with the toefl, but I'll give some corrections to help you improve:

Let's say that you ask your children to go to the zoo. They will definitely agree with that idea. Indeed, zoos are...

Well, that's all I've got! You have excellent grammar.

Follow Isai's suggestions, and you will be okay. But some of them are just suggestions, and not corrections. In some of the places where Isai made changes, it is just for a different style... most of the time, you are technically correct.

Here is a place I'll give another suggestion:
Nowadays, there are more and more not suitable kinds of animals being threatened and being on finding themselves on the verge of disappearing from the Earth.


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