Unanswered [14] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

The idea of hosting an international sports events has brought several controversies. Pros and cons.


phung199200 1 / -  
Mar 7, 2021   #1

hosting international sports events



Recently, the idea of hosting an international sports events has brought several controversies as some people opine that it is good for the country, whereas others express the opposite opinion. In this essay, I will analyze both views and state my position.

On the one hand, opponents of international sports events propose a major argument. First and foremost, they say that the government tend to invest more money and time in those events than national issues. To be more specific, there are a large number of imperative social problems need pressing such as poverty, poor healthcare system and education. Moreover, funds are used to build facilities to support the event rather than pouring into social issues, which give rise to resentment and anger, disappointment among the public. For example, after the Olympic 2016 in Rio taking place in Brazil, the country has been saddled with debt and caused many people to lose their home. Secondly, hosting an international sports events can lead to terrorism. In particular, given that there are influx of tourists visit the country, it would be too crowded for the security system to take control of, which gives terrorists the chance to conduct crime.

However, I would side with those who say the host country can reap enormous benefit by hosting international sports events. Firstly, this country can improve their image. Particularly, an international sports event is covered extensively on numerous media, so attractions and heritage sides are able to be presented to people all over the world. In addition to this, the event would be beneficial to the country as the number of tourists increase, which results in improvement in livelihood of people by selling souvenirs, being tour guides. In the second place, the event gives citizens the opportunity to broaden their horizons about cultures. Specifically, an international sports event attracts a large number of competitors from different countries and in the knowledge-based economy, learning about cultural diversity is essential for the future of the country.

In conclusion, hosting an international sports event brings the country several advantages. Nevertheless, the host country had better pay equal attention between events and social issues.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,535 3447  
Mar 8, 2021   #2
You have over written this essay. You do not need more than 300 words in the presentation since you have only 40 minutes to write the perfect essay from drafting, editing, and finalizing the content. Do not just type as many words as you can for the heck of it. Remember, the number of words over the minimum word count are not scored. Write under the minimum word count and you receive a penalty, Write more than that, and you do not get any additional points for it. Rather, it opens you up to more writing errors and unclear paragraph presentations.

Try to open your paragraphs with topic sentences rather than memorized phrases like "On the one hand" and "first and foremost" because these do not help prove your English writing abilities in any way. Rather it unnecessarily lengthens the essay, without adding to any coherence or cohesive devices on which you are scored. Try to limit yourself to one reason per paragraph because, as you can see from your second rand third reasoning paragraphs, your second reasons are as not as well explained and developed as the paragraph presentations. This then lowered your paragraph score because it then became an under developed discussion presentation. This is precisely why you should not aim to write too many words in the essay. Anywhere between 250 -300 words will suffice and keep the essay on a clear track.


Home / Writing Feedback / The idea of hosting an international sports events has brought several controversies. Pros and cons.