Unanswered [7] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


IELTSTASK1:illiteracy rates by region and by gender; 2%, 12% and 20% rate


ernhy 17 / 28  
Apr 10, 2014   #1
The chart describes that estimated world illiteracy rates by region and by gender for the year 2000. There are six country, Developed Countries, Latin America or Caribbean, East Asia or Oceania, Sub-Saharan Africa, Arab States, and South Asia.

In the chart, that shows male illiteracy in 6 areas. The lowest rates were in Developed Countries, Latin America, and East Java with rates of approximately 1%, 10%, and 8% respectively. The rates for three areas were much higher than three areas before. It is quite similar to each other. Sub-Saharan Africa, Arab States, and South Asia had rates of approximately 31%, 29%, and 34%.

Female illiteracy was much higher relatively in each area except Latin America/Caribbean where it was only slightly higher. The lowest rates for female illiteracy were again Developed Countries, Latin America/Caribbean and East Asia/Oceania with rates of approximately 2%, 12% and 20%. Again the rates for the next three areas were much higher and quite similar to each other. Sub-Saharan Africa, the Arab States and South Asia had rates of approximately 48%, 52% and 56%.

Overall, it can be concluded female illiteracy at year 2000 in six country have among more big than man illiteracy.



eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Apr 10, 2014   #2
Hi Ernhy, I have studied this sample.

I see you can write many words to describe this bar chart. You, however, are failed to describe this with a succinct explanation.

Developed Countries, Latin America, and East Java with rates of approximately 1%, 10%, and 8%.
Sub-Saharan Africa, Arab States, and South Asia had rates of approximately 31%, 29%, and 34%.
Developed Countries, Latin America/Caribbean and East Asia/Oceania with rates of approximately 2%, 12% and 20%.
Sub-Saharan Africa, the Arab States and South Asia had rates of approximately 48%, 52% and 56%.


Those sentences are called 'shopping list', by listing obvious figures one after another. The best way is to compare and contrast the key trends. This shows more professional writing than does the previous style.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTSTASK1:illiteracy rates by region and by gender; 2%, 12% and 20% rate
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳