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The Importance of Having Lots of friends


Dec 5, 2006   #1
A friend is someone who you know very well, you like, and you trust. You can't be afraid to tell a friend anything. A friend should help you and give you advice. It takes a lot of time to make friends but some are true friends, and some are just people you know. I always have a great bunch of friends. I am a kind of person that I like to have lots of friends. I enjoy having lots of friends.

The first reason I have lots of friends is because we can do goofy and crazy things together. One goody and crazy memory can be told through the following story. I went to a Mongolian children's camp named "Narlag" with my four friends three years ago. Most of the children were the same age. In the evening, the camp organized a disco. We liked to dance there. We had a crazy idea to scare children. Our idea was the ghost came during children were dancing and scared them. One of us wore a white cape, and came to the disco. All children scared and some girls cried. That was really crazy idea. After that, our teacher and the camp director knew that we did it. They called our parents, our parents took us from the camp, and we all punished. For me, I could not go out for one month during summer time.

The second reason I have lots of friends is because lots of friends is because they can help on my problems. I'm never afraid to tell my friends my problems. They can help me and give me advice. For example: Last year, my parents gave me fifty thousand tugrugs (Mongolian currency) for my class staff. It was much money for me. Unfortunately, I lost it during I was going on bus. Someone stole it. I could not tell my parents that I lost my money because that month my family's income was not enough. So, I called my best friend and asked to help me. She borrowed me fifty thousand tugrugs and I could buy my class staff. I collected my money for three months and gave her. She really helped me. Also I have very good friends in the Otero Junior College. They always help on my homework and teach me some things that I don't understand.

The third reason is because they can make me feel special. I want to tell you one story. My eighteenth year birthday was so amazing. I was with all of my friends. The most wonderful thing was that my friends didn't tell me to celebrate my birthday. They surprised me. It was very nice. Also, when I was in a Mongolian airport to go to the USA, all my friends were there. They all gave me advice and some of them cried. It was really hard to say goodbye to my friends. They sang a goodbye song for me. My friends really can make me feel special. I love all of them.

In conclusion, a friendship takes time to build. The longer you know the person the stronger friendship becomes. A friendship can go through good and bad times but the test of a true friendship is whether it can persevere through bad times.

Greetings!

I'll be happy to help you get started proofreading your essay. Let's take a look:

"One goody and crazy memory can be told through the following story."

This is probably just a typo, but you've got "goody" where I think you meant to say "goofy."

"We had a crazy idea to scare children."

You need to insert "the" in front of "children."

"Our idea was the ghost came during children were dancing and scared them."

This would sound a little smoother if you said, "Our idea was for the ghost to come while the children were dancing and scare them."

"One of us wore a white cape, and came to the disco."

You don't need the comma.

"All children scared and some girls cried.

Insert "the" in front of "children" and "were" in front of scared.

"That was really crazy idea."

Insert "a" in front of "really."

"They called our parents, our parents took us from the camp, and we all punished."

Insert "were" in front of "all punished."

"For me, I could not go out for one month during summer time."

You don't need to say "For me," since the sentence is already about you. Also, add "the" before "summer time."

You are off to a good start with your essay. It looks like the main thing you need to watch out for is making sure all the necessary articles are included with your nouns ("the", "a", etc.). The very best advice I can give you is to read your essay out loud and really listen to what you are saying. That will help you hear your words the way that your teacher will be reading them, and help you find mistakes. It might also help to read it to a friend to see if they understand what you are trying to say.

You are doing very well with your writing, so keep up the good work and practice those proofreading skills. Good luck!

Sarah, EssayForum.com


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