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impressive buildings are important for a city or hospitals and schools


Nhasir Rahmatia 6 / 9  
Apr 1, 2014   #1
Question:
Some people think that large, impressive buildings are important for a city. Other believe the money should be spent on improving schools and hospitals.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.


Answer:
Many people think that some cities have to build large, luxurious or great building. However, others say that it just wastes more money because it is not important. It is more important if that money is spent for essential things such as health service and education facility.

Many buildings are designed to be impressive building. Many people think that it is important in developing city to interest foreigner visiting the city. There are three main reasons why it becomes important. Firstly, luxurious building brings big income and increases economic system of city from tax. For instance, Wisma Kalla in Makassar invites many people to go there for making office or establishing their business, because it is comfortable and strategist place to Establish some businesses or office. Secondly, it can recognize the city to strangers and makes the city famous to other countries. Thirdly, the number of big or excellent buildings are as proof that a city is modern or big city.

On the other hand, others say that it is just to waste money for harmful thing because it will not influence the folk life. It is better if the money is used to improve health service and education facility numbers improving the quality of human life. Quality of human life depends on health status and education status. For instance, firstly, if there are many folk getting sick they will be suffer and do not do activity as usual to survive their life. If it happens automatically they need hospital where they can be cured. Secondly, the folk needs education facility for studying to make them smart as preparation to face the world and their future such as maintaining their health, looking for job, educating their family, using the high technology and others.

Overall, big and luxurious building is important for city because of its advantages but the most important is about health and education of folk which need more facilities.

Pahan 1 / 1,907 553  
Apr 1, 2014   #2
It is more important if that money is spent for essential things such as health service and education facility

Is this your view? That's not clear :(
fikri 5 / 317 71  
Apr 1, 2014   #3
nasir, when you post your essay, I suggest to give the type of your essay whether this is ielts essay or toefl essay, in the topic column,

before you write the topic, you should write the type of the essay,
e.g
IELTS TASK II : your topic (impressive building for a city)
Pahan 1 / 1,907 553  
Apr 6, 2014   #4
Many city buildings are designed to be impressive building.Many people think that it is important in developing city to interest foreigner visiting the citythat provide a certain character to the city and attract foreign tourists.

On the other hand, others say that it is just to waste money for harmful thing because it will not influence the folk life.

This you have already introduced in the introduction and therefore no need to repeat in the body para again.

It is better if the money is used to improve health service and education facility numbers improving theservices and facilities that help enhance quality of human life
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Apr 6, 2014   #5
After perusing the prompt, I conclude that the essay should be written to respond to the ideas: Money should be spent on impressive buildings or schools and hospitals

I add comments on the second paragraph: The second and third points have a repetition of the same ideas. This shows a weak paragraph . Instead of showing many ideas, it is always better giving one idea with one specific example.

folk's life

an apostrophe shows possession.

folk which need more facilities

Inappropriate antecedent :(

Overall

I am not sure this word can be used as a concluding signal.


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