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The increase in university fees and tuition for a family goes far beyond the consumer price index

malanya123 1 / -  
Oct 28, 2017   #1
Q: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? To improve the quality of education, universities should spend more money on salaries for university professors. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

money in education

Recently, investigations showed that the increase in university fees and tuition for a family goes far beyond the consumer price index. How to make a good use of the fund in a university is a major concern in improving the quality of educations. Some people argue that it is worthwhile for universities to spend more money on salaries for university professors. I believe that such a statement is unconvincing for there are many factors that determine the quality of education.

To begin with, I have to admit the author's argument is reasonable to some extent. The top ranked universities in the world spend large sum of money on compensations of famous and dedicated professors and researchers every year. Sometimes, students apply to a university because it has prestigious professors in the field they find interesting. The renovation in a universities' faculty can make a huge impact on the department of the university. For example, during the World War Two, Richard Courant left Germany to America and established the mathematical department in New York University. The mathematical institute, Courant Institute of Mathematical Sciences, is now the leader in applied mathematics research in the United States. Furthermore, it takes many years and efforts for a Ph.D. graduate to become a professor in a university. He or she has to make great progress in research and give lectures for students for many years. The efforts and money devoted to training an eligible professor justify the high salaries for many university professors. A dedicated and effective professor can in turn bring a lot benefits to university in terms of funding and fame. That is to say, the availability of abundant resources sparks a circular chain of events that allow institutions to attract more top professors and researchers, and thus even more money.

Nevertheless, even though I have addressed that providing more money on university professors is justifiable, it does not necessarily guarantee that the university would reach high-quality education. The purpose of education in a university is to cultivate talents for a society and foster positive spirits in students. So when we assess the quality of education in a university, we should not narrowly focus on the professor it possesses. Many well-known universities thrive in an environment which encourages innovation, leadership and collaboration. These qualities are highly valued by many organizations and are essential for success in one's life. So the university should provide as much necessary resources for students as possible. For example, the universities are supposed to provide necessary laboratories and equipment for engineering students. Also, different universities need money for different purposes. For universities which have much more students than its capacity, it is more important for the university to build more dormitories and classrooms.

Moreover, funding is not the only drive for reaching high quality. If a university's efficiency is greatly impeded by its clunky bureaucracies and external imposed standards, then it is impossible for a university to foster innovation and freedom among the new generations. As a result, they cannot manage their resources efficiently and quickly respond to the demands for a rapidly changing world market.

In addition, education is not the same as common merchandise whose intrinsic value can be represented by its price. In the short run, we can say the worth of college education for a student is equivalent to the expense on every individual or the salary the student make after graduation. But in the long run, the education can somehow determine the future of a nation. High-quality education is conducive to the progression of the whole society and a man's ethics. If we hastily make decisions on how to invest money on education, it may backfire because it makes potential benefits in the long run disappear.

From the above discussion, I have shown that the argument of the author is not convincing and we cannot draw a hasty conclusion based on an ambiguous causality. We should make a concerted effort to improve the quality of education.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,132 3269  
Oct 29, 2017   #2
Lanya, there are a number of problems existing in this essay that makes it impossible for me to consider it a properly developed IELTS essay. The rundown of the problems are: improperly presented prompt restatement, improperly formatted paragraphs, incorrect number of paragraphs. and information in the opening statement is presented which is not require nor allowed since it is a paragraph meant solely for prompt restatements. Now for the nitty gritty of your mistakes.

The prompt restatement is as follows: There is a belief that the the quality of education can only be improved if universities increase the salaries of their professors. While others may agree with this statement, I tend to disagree with it. In this essay, I will be presenting my line of reasoning, with accompanying evidence to support my stance on the topic for discussion.

A simple paraphrase just restates the information originally provided in the writers own words. Extra information is not required at this point because you are being scored on your ability to paraphrase and follow instructions. The 3 body paragraphs is where the actual discussion and presentation of information takes place.

Since there is a 5 sentence, 5 paragraph limit to the discussion, you should not try to over emphasize your discussions as you have done so now. Just pick one, easy to discuss and justify reason for development in the paragraph. Anything more than one becomes harder to justify and present within the allotted time frame. Remember, you still need to edit, revise, and proofread your essay before submission. So writing a short informative paragraph is always best.

Now, as per my understanding this prompt is for an IELTS essay, yet somehow, you have chosen to discuss it as a GRE essay. It is a GRE essay because you are insisting on discussing the statement of an author when no article has been provided for your review. You were only given a simple statement that must never be attributed to anyone in the discussion because there is no actual source for the statement. That "author" reference is one of the major reasons that this essay became weak and failed to follow the instructions for discussion as originally provided.

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