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Nowadays an increasing number of students prefer to extend their studies abroad.


ILIJA 1 / -  
Aug 25, 2020   #1

What are the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad?


Use specific reasons to support your opinion


When we are talking about getting knowledge, it is clear that every once in a while, students need to go elsewhere in the world to find it, whether it is overseas, or some country in their region. But of course, everything has, and this has as well, plenty of advantages and disadvantages. So, our task is to set forth both sides of studying abroad.

On the other hand, we can study abroad, which is appropriate for someone who wants to become more independent. There are plenty of reasons for that. It might be possible that in early life, as a kid, students were bullied by their parents and he or she just want to run from all the mess and try to find peace studying far away from his or her family, and it is quite possible and justified.

In the majority of cases, people go somewhere else for better knowledge. It is well known that western countries such as France, the USA, UK, etc. have the best universities, professors which can enlarge student's working experience, and above all, become independent, self-esteemed...

But it has got to be said, studying far away has some disadvantages. For instance, you grow up as a teenager without parents. Parents advice life. I know from my point of view, how much my dad's tips for success helped me in life.

Besides that, studies are long term, and for four or five years you will become a stranger in your county, which is an absolute truth. Beyond all, parents are at the biggest loss, because they are losing their kids in which they sacrificed their lives and money, they just go away and never come back. Students usually, after finishing university, get a job, and if they are abroad, stay there, and don't want to repatriate.

In conclusion, whichever decision students choose, studying at home or abroad has disadvantages and advantages. It is just an individual case. Sometimes it is good, and sometimes it is not, but it is on us to decide what to do with a time that is given to us.
Ngocnguyen777 2 / 3  
Aug 25, 2020   #2
Well, I would like to give you some of my thought about your writing.
1st paragraph: instead of using "So,..", it is better to change into "Therefore,..." because "so" cannot be at the beginning of the sentence.
2nd paragraph:- you can change "plenty of" into "numerous, a fair number of, various, a variety of,..." instead.
- "in early life" is no sense -> "in the early age"
- the following idea "in early life...." may be can rewrite better: "... so they just want to run from... and try to find their own independence by studying abroad."

3rd paragraph: - "majority cases"
4th paragraph: you shouldn't use "you" in your essay, it is informal and amateurish
- "From my point of view, I am really pf the opinion that, Personally,..." Not use "I know..." as it is a speaking style.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4772  
Aug 26, 2020   #3
349 words in 40 minutes? Not bad. However, are you sure that you kept within the prompt discussion parameters within all the paragraphs you wrote? This is a 4 paragraph essay.

Your discussion is overboard. You are not focused on a simple explanation of the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad. Your GRA scores will suffer because you use connecting words like "because" to start your sentences. You offer confusing run-on sentences in several paragraphs which leave the reader wondering what you are trying to say, resulting in several readings of the same paragraph, which is stressful for the reader and will lower the GRA score even further. You do not rally develop all of the explanations in a believable and clear manner. You over discussed but accomplished nothing because your overall presentation does not have a clear point.

The essay also separates from the original discussion topic several times. Specifically in paragraphs 4 and 5. These are irrelevant discussion points. You got so caught up in your writing that you forgot to ensure that your discussion stayed on track. As such, these paragraphs will not help to increase your score, it will only lower it. Focus on the clarity and relevance of your writing next time. Stay on track.


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