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increasing weight against declining health.


sharmajali 5 / 14 1  
May 13, 2013   #1
IELTS
Question :- In some countries the average weight of the people is increasing and their health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the cause of these problems and what means could be taken to solve them.

For the past decade we are witnessed to this dramatic changed occurred to our life styles. An up surge in westernization and urbanization took their control over our lives, which results in the increase of waist size by turning down our health. This change struck over many countries, which are now carving them from inside. There is not one cause to portrait but many; so here I am going to deal with them and the possible measures to solve them.

The first and main cause is the change in working habits, from the early occupation like farming, fishing they jumped into desk-bound work, which not only made them sluggish and fragile but also increased their level of stress. According to many researchers most people rely on food to reduce stress, these all ends up in obesity and ill health.

Second is the food pattern, now we depend more on fast food than traditional one because of the lack of time and energy. This adds up on the calorie not nourishment, which is one of the leading causes for heart problems. According to a research in America heart attack is the leading cause of death than any other deceases. Which is the end result of our modern lifestyle.

Third are the travelling means and the easy access to online ordering, makes them couch potatoes and immobile. When this calorie accumulated over years increases it will start showing in our systems in form of different ailments has deleterious effect on our wellness.

By knowing the cause we can find measures to resolve it. Like rearranging office environment by making everything available at walk able distance will initiate employers to move around. Providing gym and yoga facilities under the same roof will stimulate them to joint. By reversing them to adopt traditional food habit will be another major step towards health. This kind of encouragements should be started at the earliest stage of life, so that it would be easy for them to follow.

In conclusion, without the awareness regarding the harm they are bringing upon them due to this sedentary lifestyle every other step will go in vain.

maruko_a2609 4 / 7 1  
May 13, 2013   #2
deceases

=> deseases
I think "encouragement" do not have "s"
shaddy 17 / 47 7  
May 13, 2013   #3
For the past decade we are witnessed ing to this dramatic changed that has occurred to in our life styles.

which results ed in t

deceases

disease

Third are the commodious travelling means and the easy access to online orderin
OP sharmajali 5 / 14 1  
May 14, 2013   #4
Thanks Shaddy and Maruko.

Dumi again i need you here. Please help me.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
May 14, 2013   #5
For the past decade we are witnessed to this dramatic changedthat occurred to in our life styles.

... this sentence has a few issues :( You can tell this same idea in a more simpler, yet interesting manner;
During the past decade, we have experienced a dramatic increase in average weight gain of the people due to the changes that took place in our life-styles.During the past decade, we have experienced a dramatic increase in average weight gain of the people due to the changes that took place in our life-styles.

This change struck over many countries, which are now carving them from inside.

.... this sentence too does not convey your idea properly. You need to re-phrase it .
xucoi 14 / 41 10  
May 14, 2013   #6
Dumi again i need you here. Please help me.

May you didnt need help of others :D. Just kidding he he.

An up surge in westernization and urbanization took their control over our lives

I think It uses present perfect.
The westernization and urbanization have affected our lives in all respects and resulted in an upsurge that brings our waist size up and our health down.

This change struck over many countries, which are now carving them from inside

It maybe: "These changes have spread over many countries rapidly and they become one of worse syndroms that humans have faced with.
[quote=sharmajali] According to many researchers most people who rely on food to reduce stress will ends up in obesity and ill health. [/quot
For your reflection ^^.


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