Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment. Only large companies and businesses can make a difference.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some people believe the main cause of environmental development is specifically addressed in the big manufacturers, whereas individuals are too limited to make difference from this case. While the large business could produce several technologies having many benefits for better lives, I would tend to argue against such nation because humans with their social behavior could change the conditions to be exceptional as well.
Admittedly, many industries have produced devices in large numbers encouraging the improvement in urban and rural areas. This is because the big companies have power to manufacture massively innovations which could keep conditions to be more peaceful and healthier. A case in point, for few decades, many factories have improved technologies with exhaust fumes such as gas-fueled cars becoming electric vehicles more friendly. As a result, the air pollution problems could be unconsciously solved because of these innovations.
On the other hand, if people do not have responsibility to keep and develop their circumstances, the situation will not be finer. This is because people's behavior is the main cause whether the environment will be friendly or not. For instance, in the recent time, the bad habit of people such as throwing rubbish everywhere could not be solved by others except themselves. It is clear that the development of surroundings depends on the people's habits.
To sum up, it should be realized that people also engage in environmental impacts, whereas more effects of the improving circumstances is a consequence of the large businesses. Thus, governments, companies, and people collaborate to create the better situation in the future.
(260 words)
Hi Ilham, I find in reading your essay. It's a well-written essay; the flow of your ideas is good and the argument is acceptable. To enhance your writing further, please consider my contributions as follows:
- ...produce several technologies havingwith many benefits...
- This is because the big companies have the power to...
- On the other hand, the situation will remain worst if people do (...) and develop their circumstancesenvironment(this word is suitable than "circumstances") , the situation will not be finer.
- This is because people's behavior is the main causedetermine whether the environment ...
- ... companies, and people must collaborate with each other to create the better situation in the future.
- ... engage in environmental impacts, . whereas moreFor instance, the environmental impact resulted from the rapid development of some larger businesses.(I have modified the sentence)
In addition, a good essay consists of three sentences in each paragraph. Thus, you can split of the sentences in the above essays. This also makes your writing looks more readable because sometimes a lengthy sentence may confuse the reader.
Hope this helps.
