I wrote the following essay about the concept of AIDS disease
so please i need your feedback
AIDS Day
Yesterday, December 1, was the world's AIDS day. Many people who live in the world honor this day of December 1 for remembering millions of humans who died due to this incurable disease. Also a lot of people in the world allocate this date as a day of moral lecture, awareness, and advice about the danger of the disease of AIDS causes to humans. The existence of the AIDS disease was first reported in Los Angeles, United States in 1981. Separately, in France in 1983, doctors at Institute Pasteur announced the isolation of a new virus that they believed was the cause of the infection of AIDS. It is also believed that the disease originally infected a group of homosexual men before it spread throughout the entire world and taking the life of millions of people in the world. While it is debatable how we could control the risk of this incurable disease of AIDS, knowing its meaning, cause, and treatment is the best way to tackle its threat.
Foremost, AIDS stands for Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome. In other words, AIDS means the rise of new substances that diminish the immune system of the body, the white blood cells. A virus called HIV, which is abbreviated from human immunodeficiency virus, causes this terminal disease. The HIV virus first attacks the white blood cells of the body to destroy their ability of protecting the body from various kinds of maladies. Then it moves inside the CD4 lymphocytes cells of the white-blood-cells and makes millions of duplicates of itself each day before it gradually spreads throughout the entire body. Next the body that the HIV virus infected produces antibodies and special cells called "Macrophages" to defend itself and prevent the virus to reproduce many copies of itself. However, after ten to fifteen years, the HIV virus destroys many CD4 cells until the number of CD4 cells decrease into less than 200 per ml. Once the CD4 cells reach 200 or less per ml, the HIV virus develops into AIDS, which makes the body's immune system nonexistence. As a result, the body of the infected person with AIDS can easily catch many diseases such as tuberculoses and flu.
On the other hand there are three major ways of getting the infection of AIDS. First way is having a sexual intercourse with an infected person. The HIV virus that causes AIDS is mainly transmitted from one person to another throughout sex. As many doctors estimate, more than ninety percent of the HIV virus is spread through having a sexual contact with the infected individual. In addition, the HIV virus is frequently passed by sharing needles or syringes of drugs. Drug users who practice sharing needles contaminated with the disease are highly at risk of getting HIV virus as many researchers of HIV virus suggested. So, health care workers such as nurses need to be cautious whenever they wanted to perform a blood transfusion. Moreover, an infected mother with HIV virus can transmit the virus to the fetus inside her womb. This passage could happen during her pregnancy or at birth. For example, healthnewsflash.com website declares that, "Approximately one-quarter to one-third of all untreated pregnant women infected with HIV will pass the infection to their babies."
Finally, AIDS, which is caused by a virus called HIV, is an incurable disease. Currently, there is no medical treatment that gets rid of the malady, but in the past ten years researchers of AIDS have developed some drugs to fight against the HIV virus and its related infections. Even though the drugs such as RT inhibitors, AZT, ddC, ddI and d4T that the researchers developed do not ultimately heal the disease, they prevent the HIV virus to develop into AIDS. Also, health care providers use antiretroviral therapy as well as various kinds of drugs, for instance, Foscarnet, Ganciclovir Trimethoprim or Sulfamethoxazole drugs, to treat diverse individuals infected by HIV virus.
In conclusion, the terminal disease of AIDS, which is caused by the HIV virus that attack the immune system of human body is a risky problem that currently exist throughout the world. The HIV virus is quickly spreading throughout the world and we should act as swiftly as possible to stop its spread because each year it causes the death of thousands of people all over the world. Though there are no commonly recognized methods of preventing the disease of AIDS that all humans have accorded with, learning the meaning, the cause and the treatment of AIDS is the best solution to rein in the threat of this terminal infection
Any FeedbackThis essay is good! You really put down all the necessary info. Its really informing. I was wondering whether you were limited to words because the length is not as expected of an admission essay. What was the topic. If it is an admission essay, remember that the school is interested in you and not AIDS so u av to find a way to put ur views and traits into the essay. Also the first line of the paragraph starts with "on other hand.." as if to contrast the previous paragraph. Mean while, its just a change in focus so u need to use something else.
