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toefl; Internet had negative effects on civilization


jag 5 / 9  
Sep 27, 2010   #1
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The invention of the Internet has had negative effects on your civilization. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Internet, no doubt, did escalate the convenience, efficiency and quality of human communication. However, I have to agree that it has impacted very negatively on our civilization.

First and foremost, internet too has failed to escape from the ugly hands of commercialization. We all know that internet has the capability of delivering any information in a fraction of a second. Therefore its popularity is unimaginable. This popularity and efficiency are highly abused by business minded people who use it for ill purposes such as pornography, fraud, crime etc. Such people have cleverly tapped the weaknesses of human mind to earn their living and hence impose a great danger on our civilization. For example, even a small child is able to access a web site that promotes pornography.

Secondly, internet has impacted the family lives of people. Since the availability of internet is unlimited and fairly inexpensive, internet connection has become a common feature in many households. However, this has distanced the family members from one another. For example, before internet was available in my country, the people used to sit together after dinner and had lengthy chats. Today, if there are three members in the family, at least one person is always in front of the computer accessing internet. This had not only affected the family lives adversely, but leads our society in the direction of individualism.

Thirdly, the children are increasingly becoming addicted to internet. Of course, there are many benefits offered to children by internet in respect of enhancing their knowledge. However, they hardly use internet for such productive purposes. My niece, who is now eleven years, spends most of the day by chatting to her friends through face-book. She wastes her valuable time for studies which significantly contributes to her future. My niece is no exception to the other children of her age. The parents today have become helpless in front of this social dilemma.

Although internet has many merits in its favor, the above reasons have led me to conclude it has adversely affected our civilization.

Reby 1 / 5  
Sep 27, 2010   #2
That is a great essay but there is still room for changes, the third paragraph the sentence "My niece, who is now eleven years, spends most of the day by chatting to her friends through face-book", is wrong i think t should be " chatting with her friends"
jems007 5 / 10  
Sep 28, 2010   #3
great.. you can also include hacking, terrorism ...
mea505 - / 265  
Sep 28, 2010   #4
Hi alahakon,

How much space were you provided with this essay? I ask because there is so much more that you could have said about the Internet! One person, Jems, has already touched on one of the issues, and that is the amount of terrorism that has been spawned due to the Internet -- terrorism that probably would or could not have happened if it were not for the Internet.

I think you might want to go back into the essay and think about other negative aspects of the Internet and how these have affected us as a society. There is just so much more to write about. Ask how much space you are provided for the essay.

--Mark
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,335 129  
Sep 30, 2010   #5
"Escalate" usually refers to something that is "going" or "moving" or "happening" so it is not the best word here...

The Internet, no doubt, did increase the convenience, efficiency and quality of human communication.

Secondly, internet has impacte d ---- Capitalize Internet, and use "the"
Secondly, the Internet has impacted ...

...addicted to the Internet.

Of course, there are many benefits offered to children by the Internet with respect to enhancing their knowledge. However, they hardly use the Intern et for such productive purposes.

...friends through FaceBook. ---- Ha ha, well maybe that is productive, too!She learns about technology, develops reading and writing skills, and gets a sense of how social networking can be used.

Okay, so practice the correct ways 10 times each! Remember to use "the" before Internet.


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