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INTRODUCTIONS FOR ESSAYS ABOUT DIFFERENT ISSUES - IELTS WRITING TASK 2


Permata992 7 / 12  
Aug 25, 2016   #1
Hi all,
Please give me writing feedback in my writing to help me create a better essay next time. I really hope that you will give me some correction to improve my writing skill. Thank you

Exercise 1
As global trade increases, many goods, including those we use on a daily basis, are produced in other countries and have to be transported long distances.

Do the benefits of this trend out weight the drawbacks?

Introduction 1
Nowadays, a global trade expand significantly, many nations has been importing commodity from others countries. As a consequently, it will took a long a long length of transportation. The easiness of trading will give the advantages and disadvantages. I am personally believe that such policy gives more benefit rather than drawback which I will explain in the following paragraphs.

Exercise 2
In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong while others consider it as valuable work experiences.

Introduction 1
Recently, many children take some kind of paid occupation because of economic's instability in several nations. There have responsibility to help their family's financial problems. Certain people observe that this is completely unacceptable, while others believe it will give great work experience. As such I will discuss both of perspectives in the following paragraphs.

Exercise 3
Unpaid community service should be compulsory part of high school program (for example, working for charity, improving the neighborhood, or teaching sport to younger children).

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Introduction 1
These days, many new ideas arise aiming to improve society and reinforce the relation between community's members. One of the suggested ideas is to create the unpaid community services compulsory part for high school students to do some programs of course charity one, to support their organization. Certain people strongly discuss that these programs should be included in high school education. Personally, I am persuade that community service should be part of high school programs by several reasons.
Beauty17 56 / 88 5  
Aug 25, 2016   #2
halo gempii welcome to essay forum. it nice to read your introductions.. here some corrections from me..

One of the suggested ideas is to create ( ideas to create/ is created i think if is to create there are 2 verbs) the unpaid community servicesservice compulsory part for high school ...

break a leg gempii.. i will waiting for your other essays..


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