Unanswered [8] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3

IELTS TASK 1 JAPANESE INVOLVED IN OVERSEAS TRAVEL


mhss 18 / 53 18  
Mar 18, 2013   #1
PLEASE HELP ME WITH THIS IELTS ESSAY.
Answer

The bar chart illustrates the number of Japanese (in millions) involved in overseas travel over a period of 10 years starting from 1985 while the line graph reveals the percentage of Japanese travelers landing in Australia over the same period of review.

On closer examination of figures, there were 5 million Japanese travelers in 1985 and exhibited a steady rise over the next 5 years reaching a 2-fold rise by the end of 1990. Unfortunately, the trend was reversed having a slight drop by 0.5 million in the next year after which it recovered with a number of 12 million travelers for the consecutive 2 years. Subsequently, visitors involved in foreign travel grew up sharply from 1994 and reached a peak at 15 million, which was a 3- fold rise than that of the figures recorded 10 years back.

Shifting to the second graph, it is clearly shown that there was a decline in Japanese travelers to Australia in 1990 proceeded by a gradual increase from 2% to 5%. In fact, it was able to maintain the same rising pattern for the next 4 years climbing to 6 % margin by 1994. However, in 1995 there was a slight reduction in Australian patronage by the Japanese visitors.

In conclusion, other than the two drops in middle and latter part over this span of 10 years, the trend was upwards in both Japanese tourists going abroad and the Australian contribution for the benefit of Japanese visiting the Australian soil.

gyal 3 / 5  
Mar 20, 2013   #2
hi friend. you wrote very well. but at list you must be show us the graph . so its will easy to understand to other people. any way good luck ...
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Mar 24, 2013   #3
Hi mhss,
gyal is right. Why dont you upload the graph? Then you'd receive more relevant feed backs. As usual your writing is really good in this essay too. You may visit the following website that may help you get more information about the expected essay structure;


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 1 JAPANESE INVOLVED IN OVERSEAS TRAVEL