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Jokowi congratulated the United States President-elect, Donald J. Trump


mem77 62 / 98 6  
Nov 10, 2016   #1
President of Indonesia, Joko "Jokowi" Widodo congratulated the United States President-elect, Donald J. Trump on Wednesday a few hours after the full result of the US election. He said that as the name of Indonesia government and all of people in Indonesia, he congratulated to 45th president-elect of the United States. Furthermore, Jokowi said that Indonesia was ready to continue of mutual diplomatic relationship among both countries. And also he hoped that the mutual cooperation between Indonesia and the United States of America can create serenity and welfare through the world.

As we known that Donald J. Trump was selected as 45th president of United States a few days ago. He won the United States election by 273 electoral votes, while his rival Hillary Clinton just had 218 electoral votes. Donald J. Trump won the election because the United States has a policy that every single person can win the election if they got 270 electoral votes and he got more than that.

thejakartapost

ryan31 65 / 96 15  
Nov 10, 2016   #2
hai edho
I have some advice
hope it helps

... government and all of the people in Indonesia,...

... ready to continue of the mutual diplomatic ...
... and welfare throughout the world.

He won the United States election by 273 ...
He got 273 electoral votes, whereas his rival Hillary Clinton only had 218 electoral votes. It is true that Donald Trump won the election in the USA.

Donald J. Trump won the election because the United States has a policy ...I think it is unnecessary to mention this sentence since readers get the point from the previous sentence

thanks
yurikeyuri 43 / 61 2  
Nov 11, 2016   #3
Hello,
I will give you some my correction, hope this help you

President of Indonesia, Joko "Jokowi" Widodo, congratulated the (...) Donald J. Trump, on Wednesday a few ...

you can reconstruct the paragraph with from common to specific information, so this paragraph can change in the second paragraph in here.

Donald J. Trump won the election because the United States ..."I think this information not important to inform in this paragraph, maybe you make change it with information about place of the Donald Trump's winning" .

maybe you can change your statement in
He said that as the name of (...) in Indonesia, said that he congratulated to ...


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