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"I'm from Kuala Lumpur" - Essay about my self


thenadi 1 / 1  
Jan 11, 2011   #1
Hi, im newbie here and my english is not really fluent, since english is not my first language in my country, but yet english is like my first language because we had been lectured in english and have been ask to do our assignment in english. then suddenly, i founded this website that i think can help me improve my language especially in helping me to develop my idea to write an essay. So last week i have been ask to do an essay about my self, just 1 paragraph for this week and I will post another thread for next task. Ya it sound simple but it very difficult when it come to write about our self. I also have do some revision to others post that discussed about writing an essay about self. So ya i know, copy others idea will be suspended but i just love the idea so if someone thought my word come from their word, so please inform me.I just do this essay for my assignment only and not for others purpose. thanks you.

So please check my essay, and your opinion are very welcome.

So this is my 1st paragraph

About me about life,

My name is ___ and I am from Kuala Lumpur. I am twenty three years old years old, single and the fourth child out of six siblings. I was born on ______ in Kuala Lumpur and lived there for nearly half of my life before I further my studies in _____ for two years. I have hair complexion, medium height, dark eyes and not wear glasses. There are eight members in my family which is my father, my mother, two elder's brother, one elder sister, and two youngest sisters. My father is a pensioner of administrative assistant, _____ and my mother is housewife.
ziranshng 5 / 17  
Jan 11, 2011   #2
I have hair complexion

I assume you mean "fair".

I have hair complexion, medium height, dark eyes and not wear glasses.

Rewrite as: "I am medium height with a fair complexion and dark eyes, and do not wear glasses"

There are eight members in my family which isincluding my father

My father is a pensioner ofan administrative assistant

I assume these are the ideas you're trying to get across, correct me if I'm wrong.
OP thenadi 1 / 1  
Jan 11, 2011   #3
Thank you so much. but for

: My father is a pensioner of an administrative assistant

I mean by, my father is a pensioner for about 3 years, before this he work as an administrative assistant.

Hum i am not sure, either my word is correct or not
atham64 4 / 12  
Jan 11, 2011   #4
There are eight members in my family which is my father, my mother, two older brothers, one older sister, and two younger sisters


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