Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3

TOEFL: Should land be developed or left in natural condition?

MarianaS 5 / 14 8  
Dec 6, 2014   #1
In your country, is there more need for land to be left in its natural condition or is there more need for land to be developed for housing and industry? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

land development - the ukrainian example

Development of civilization leads to diversification of purposes for which ground can be exploited. Nowadays, land is not only seen as part of natural ecosystem, but also as a territory for industrial and dwelling buildings. Doubtless, intensive use of land for building purposes forces us to raise issues of balance of human interests and other living forms' needs. In my country there is a prevailing need in use of land as natural resource, rather than territory for housing and industrial activity. I will endeavor to explain the stance of my country in detail further.

First of all, historical factor is one of the reasons that explain why my country prefers disposal of soil as natural resource. The cult of land has always been a part of national culture in my country. It has always been treated as the treasure that we inherited from our ancestors. Therefore, my country's legislation imposes strict restrictions on use of land for purposes not linked with preservation of nature. For instance, size of land that can be granted by the local government for a private person for housing is considerably less that one that is given for agriculture.

In addition to that, high fertility of the Ukrainian soil is another important argument for preserving it in natural condition. The unique mineral composition makes possible efficient plants growing even without application of techniques or harmful chemical substances that usually aimed at increasing land fertility. As an illustration I would like to admit that my country is one of the largest world producers of organic food exporting more than a million tons of agricultural products per year.

To sum up, choice of any modern state concerning land use depends on a range of factors including, but not restricted to, historical traditions and quality of soil. Taking these indicators into account, my country's government has decided to facilitate preserving land in its natural state primarily through the relevant legal restrictions.

Mariana Semehen ©

P.S. Dear friends, I will be grateful for your comments)

Zoriana 2 / 2 4  
Dec 6, 2014   #2
I would recommend you to substitute some words in your essay with more relevant ones and fix some mistakes. E.g.:

... raise issues of balance ofbetween human interests and ...

size of landplot that can be granted by the local government

In general, I would say that your essay is very specific with numerous examples as it should be. Well done!
vangiespen - / 4,137 1449  
Dec 6, 2014   #3
Definitely an improved mode of writing Mariana. Your writing shows a clear understanding of the prompt and you have managed to present specific reasons and supporting arguments for the perceived stance of your country. Perceived stance because there is no clear statement detailing that the facts you are presenting are from authoritative figures from the government of your country who believe in this sentiment. Your essay would have been greatly improved by the use of actual government point of views instead of what seems to be only a seriously worded personal point of view. The essay is effective in any case. Though there are still grammatical errors that need to be addressed, the essay works in the overall context of the prompt.

Home / Writing Feedback / TOEFL: Should land be developed or left in natural condition?