Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children).
To what extent do you agree or disagree ?
Community service learning is very essential for students. Some people believe that it should be to become a compulsory part of high school curriculum so that student can learn how to be a good member in society and it is very helpful for community. However, I personally argue that unpaid community service program should not to be a compulsory subject inasmuch as this is social activity that student can do it everyday.
I would argue that by implementing the unpaid public service, students are more likely to know how to live in society. This is because they learn to service the community necessity. As an obvious example, one of the project on this program is to observe environment issues around the community. As a result, students know how to make environment be better.
In addition, society tend to be happy by the appearance of this subject. For example, bulid some infrastructures or cleaning around public spaces such as park or masjid led society to appreciate in this activities. It is thus clear that unpaid society service is very helpful for community.
On the other hand, this program does not have to be a compulsory subject. As such, student can do this activity everyday and has become on of the major activity in society. Taking Indonesia as an example, teenagers are demanded to join in social activity such as cleaning the road around their home every Sunday. It is becoming a culture in Indonesia where people work together in Sunday morning to clean environment around their live. There is no doubt that it should not to be a compulsory subject.
The aforementioned evidence shows that although this program led student to learn in social life and very useful for society, it should not to be a compulsory subject because it must be done every day. I personally argue that i t depends on individual willing where people should not to be demanded joining the program.
I would argue...
I think you use use this expression too often! You should stick to using it just for the side you agree with. Since your intro states you are against it, you should lead into the other side by saying, "some people might say..."
it should not be a compulsory subject
I think you overstate this opinion, and should only use it sparingly. Overuse of an idea belittles it, and you should focus on just stating it clearly. However, you did two paragraphs on pro and one on con. Perhaps the pro could be fused into one paragraph. You seem to be again, unsure of yourself.
Don't be. You have alto to say, and your writing is fairly good.
Just some pointers, to brush it up!
Good job. I think this is an excellent start!
ef_carol
I would delete the word "very" completely in the first paragraph. Simplifying what you are saying actually sounds cleaner. Also, it's redundant to say "I, personally.." I used to do this a lot, until a Business professor pointed out to me that I and personally are the same thing. Although, it's such a common phrase. :) Good points in your paper!
Some people believe that it should be to become a compulsory part of high school curriculum so that student can learn how to be a good member in society and it is very helpful forhelp the community.
I would argue that by implementing the unpaid public service, students are more likely to know how to live in society. This is because they learn to service the community necessity. As an obvious example, one of the project on this program is to observe environment issues around the community. As a result, students know how to make environment be better.
Apart from the fact than this is a very well-structured paragraph, you should try to make it flow more naturally. Try the following example:
From my point of view, students can enhance their understanding in being a part of a society by volunteering in community service activities. This way, they get to learn about a wide range of of community necessities. Indeed, this potency is reflected in their activity, for example surrounding environment observation program. Students have a great chance to upgrade their know-how to make their closest environment be better.
Good luck!
