Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
the language barrier
In these days, there has been a controversial assumption that getting to live abroad can create both social and practical issues due to the fact that foreign language is a must. I personally agree with that owing to these following arguments.
First of all, language barrier is the key point which causes practical matters like conflict in a relationship. It is apparent that different languages have each style of speaking, leading to distinguished accents, voices and even body gestures. This could be the root which resulted in misunderstanding between some Indian and American students, namely, in a memorial time of a conference when the host took picture of attending delegates, American post with two fingers with palm side while a few Indian, with vice-versa side. What was not well-known that, in some cultures, the posture of some Indian did perceivedly showed less regards, therefore the American students thought the Indian lacked formality.
Secondly, social aspects should be considered when referring to language-related problems. It is generally seen that the cultures according to nationalities are quite distinct. These, accompanied by language obstacle, could direct non-native speakers to undergo hardships in work opportunities. Hence, they probably contribute to a large proportion of unemployment rate, especially in competitive markets like the US and Japan. Moreover, the immigrants could be the victims of bullying and racism since they could hardly interact with other residential citizens. For instance, in the US there are getting more and more cases of black discrimination.
In conclusion, social and practical disadvantages might appear when someone moves to other countries. In my opinion, overseas bureaucracies should give aid to newcomers in terms of finance and welfare.
Overall this is a great essay but there are some mistakes:
the posture of some Indian perceived show fewer regards
Personally, I think you should use a dot rather than a comma. You should use some structures in English such as Although..., not only... but also, ... to replace a comma to make a complex sentence. Moreover, I think you should use clear and to-the-point transitional words such as Apparently, In fact, In addition simply because this is 250-270 words essay.
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Vu, this essay contains a series of grammatical problems that cannot allow you to score more than a 3 overall. The reasons for this score are based on your lack of control over word usage, sentence structure, and inability to develop properly referenced English sentences. The presentation is so bad that the meaning of every paragraph is either non-existent or distorted in meaning.
Your essay lacks a clear position based on the extent requirement of the essay discussion. Your ideas require more development in order to make its meaning clearer to the reader. There is a lack of relationships between your ideas. You barely use cohesive devices, and your English vocabulary use is difficult to understand due to the lack of logical sentence presentations. This is basically a very badly developed essay that cannot allow you to pass the test in an actual setting.