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The line chart compares the data regarding the figure of books read by men and women at Burnaby Lib.


wahyutri13 10 / 13  
Jan 18, 2016   #1
The line chart compares the data regarding the figure of books read by men and women at Burnaby Public Library starting from 2011 to 2014. The data is measured in the number of books read. The most obvious pieces of information are that the number of men readers rose significantly and overtook the number of women readers at approximately 10,000 books in 2013.

Initially, the level of books read by women stood at around 6,000 books in 2011, it was higher than men reader that stood at around 2,000 to 4,000 books. After that, the number of women readers rose gradually from 2011 to 2013 and hit a peak a highest point to 10,000 books in 2013. After a short peak, the number of books read decreased at around 4,000 to 5,000 in 2014.

On the other hand, the rate of books read by men stood at more than 2,000 in 2011. This trend to increase significantly and overtook the number of women readers in 2013. It moved from about 2,000 to 4,000 in 2011 and reached a 14,000 at the end of this period.



ichanpants89 [Contributor] 16 / 777 309  
Jan 18, 2016   #2
After a short peak, the number of books read decreased at around 4,000 to 5,000 in 2014.

- peak = highest point, adding adjective "short" before "peak" made the words become complicated in meaning.
- ambiguous sentence, it can be decreased from 4000 to 5000 (which actually not decreasing),

it can be decreased from 10,000 (previous sentence)

After that, the number of women readers rose gradually from 2011 to 2013 and hit a peak a highest point to 10,000 books in 2013

better change the structure form to "Subsequently, 2011 to 2013 witnessed a gradual rose in the rates of books read by woman and hit the top at roughly 10,000 books in 2013."
yogi07 4 / 3  
Jan 18, 2016   #3
that stood at around 2,000 to 4,000 books

it has already written in the next paragraph

hit a peak a highest point to

... redundant
fariz10 13 / 18 2  
Jan 18, 2016   #4
Hi, Wahyu
I found two sentences which have same meaning. I thought you should erase one of them.

initially, the level of books read by women stood at around 6,000 books in 2011, it was higher than men reader that stood at around 2,000 to 4,000 books.

Because I found sentence in the next paragraph has same meaning.


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