Unanswered [25] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


Longer life spans. Cutting edge of technology has driven advanced facilities in health sector.


Risty01 10 / 16 1  
Aug 13, 2016   #1
Longer life spans and improvements in the health of older people suggest that people over the age of sixty-five can continue to live full and active lives.

In what ways can society benefit from the contribution that older people can make?


Cutting edge of technology has driven advanced facilities in health sector. People' life tends to be longer than even before and it argued that they are more health and active in societies. I would argue that elderly still productive in their age particularly in the modern families who concern to pursue their careers, and they also can make contribution in education sectors.

In reality, most of parents spend a lot of time in working to build a stable position in a company.
Women as housewives are also becoming more independent in financial area and sometimes they decides to pursue their study in a high level of education. It means that lots of time has delivered doing such careers and activities, while they have responsibility to take care their children. Having active and health grandparents will be beneficial for those women because they can help to nurture their grandchildren at home and no need to pay a service from babysitter. The elderly also can establish a close relationship with grandchildren to form family tie.

In addition, being health at the age over sixty-five is still possible to teach and conduct a research even share experiences or skills for young people. Those jobs must be appropriated with them, related with advanced skills and enormous experiences that they had. This is also the way for them to keep culture still exist with telling history or playing traditional game.

To sum up, people aged over 65 are still health in this modern of facilities especially in the health area. It encourages them to keep fit with many advantages activities such as supervising the member of family and contributing in education field.
dinartika19 37 / 67 6  
Aug 13, 2016   #2
People' life tends to be longer than even before and it argued that -> compound sentence

people's life tends to be longer than even before and itarguedargues that

most of parents spend a lot of time in working to build ...

sometimes they decidesdecide
that lots ofmost of time has delivered for doing such as careers and activities

being health , are still health -> adj : healthy


Home / Writing Feedback / Longer life spans. Cutting edge of technology has driven advanced facilities in health sector.
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳