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Toefl - What makes a good parent?


s80776 1 / 1  
Feb 12, 2011   #1
Our parents are the person who have an influential impact on their children, and therefore they are the most indispensible role in our steady growth. There are some characteristics which are important of being a good parents.

First, they must support their children in any way. After all, parents are the ones who trust most. If they can not gain any support, it will do harm do their developments. Take an extreme case for example. Not all students are good at academic field, so they are various sorts of jobs to choose from. At this time, parents are playing a critical role to encourage them to do something else. However, if they pay less attention on them or even ignore them, it seems they are abandoned by this world. This will make them less confident and may finally go astray.

Equally important is responsible. If they don't correct their children's bad behaviors at early stage, it will lead to a serious consequence in the end. I think my friend Jimmy is a good example. He is the only child in his family and thus he had been mollycoddled since he was born. At the beginning, he just didn't want to write the homework at most. Gradually, he behaviors became more and more deviant. Finally, he was put in jail due to a theft in a shop. According to this case, parents are indeed the people who could prevent this happening.

Lastly, the capacity of love is quite necessary. Studies show that being in a loved family will for form a well-sounded character. Once children live in a happy and careless family, they easily tend to become more open-minded and sociable. This will be likely to communicate with people and willing to accept suggestion. These traits also are more likely to make them fit in with a group or society.

To sum up, a good parents must be responsible, full of love and always on children's side. Parents who have these characteristics will make sure their kids will always be the best.

kak3521 2 / 6  
Feb 12, 2011   #2
Overall, it's a great essay. I see some grammatical errors which could easily be fixed, but the content of the essay is great. Here are some of my suggestions and I might be repeating some of the things that Karina said... :)

Our parents are the personpeople who have an influential impact on their children, and therefore they arehave the most indispensible role in our steady growth. There are some characteristics which are important ofto/for being a good parents .Or you could even reword this sentence to read something like: There are a few characteristics that are of importance to being a good parent.

To sum up, a good parents must be responsible, full of love and always on their children's side. Parents who have these characteristics will make sure their kids will always be the best.
OP s80776 1 / 1  
Feb 12, 2011   #3
Thanks karinab,

I think I should pay more attention on my grammar

Really appreciate your corrections, Kak3521

It's quite useful and I do learn a lot.


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