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'Who is Martin Luther King?' my research essay for Eng Comp.

MayDo 1 / -  
Oct 10, 2011   #1
I am student who are using English as the second language. I am taking Eng Comp I this semester. I got a homework that I have to improve my essay. The teacher would like me to change a half of verbs to more eloquent or intense verb. I tried to change it but I do not sure it will be good enough. Therefore, I would like anyone please help me to check and change the verbs for me. Thank you very much.


Who is Martin Luther King?

The personality of a leader is very important leader possess, intelligence, compassion and determination which set them apart from everyone else. When a person has traits like these, it helps them to decide if they will follow a leader or not. These characteristics of leadership are very important. These traits encourage people to have trust and faith in them as happened during the 1960s, the United Stated was on unusual situation; the war in Vietnam, leaders were being assassinated, civil unrest and protesting. The situation was influenced by the leaders who lead people to agree with their idea, and follow their purposes. One of the most famous leaders of American history is Dr. Martin Luther king Jr. Dr. King was African-American activist and very importance leader in Civil Right Movement. He and the movement brought attention how African-Americans had a horrible life under segregation, treatment black Americans as second-class citizens without equal rights as white Americans. Dr. King was the most prominent protest's leader during the civil rights movement who finally brought America to beginning in the release of segregation and discrimination based on the color of a person skin. How can Dr. King be presented as a heroic leader in the civil rights history? Dr. King has a special characteristic which helped him lead and influence people to trust, and follow him. Dr. King speech: "I Have a Dream" that was used against the segregation: "I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character," this quote reflected how Dr. King felt in regard to segregation or government. Dr. King was an American's hero. Do you want to know why do I think like that?

Before taking English Composition class, I had only heard of Dr. King only from the United Stated federal holiday, and I was curious about him. I would like to know how Dr. King could become such an influential protest leader in the civil right movement, and why did he do that? I spent my whole week reading some of his famous writing; Letter from a Birmingham Jail and searching more information about him. Being as immigrate who has been treated by some Americans as a third class citizen, Dr. King was a great civil right fighter and a great speaker. I absolutely honor his courage and what he devoted all of his life to the civil right movement, when he was a man of god, and did not have any legal power in his hands. Dr. King started his movement from his brave heart. Dr. King did not want to see his African-American brothers and sisters have a painful life by the injustices system to other African-American. During uncommon time, the movement would be very difficult and impossible but Dr. King excelled. I think he had a super brave heart, enough to push him forward for making a call of justices from the segregators. His brave heart was performed by a beautiful dream about equality and fairness in American society. He did not have just his dream, but he carried all the African American people dreams and hopes on his shoulders.

Next, Dr. King did not use just his brave heart to carry his brothers and sisters dream, but he used his intelligence to carry out their dream and desire. His movement used a non violent speech, and letter to gain the attention of American. Dr. King traveled to many states, appeared wherever there was protest, and spoke over two thousands times. He wrote the most famous article when he was in jail in Birmingham; "Letter from a Birmingham Jail". He addressed the dream speech; "I Have a Dream" to the President John F. Kennedy when they were marching in Washington D.C. The letter and the speech represented all of African-American situation, and the civil right from the government by his talent rhetoric. It was showed his clever, calm, reasonable and strong intention. I think Dr. King was very smart to get the attention of people by peacefully marching against the racists. He avoided unwanted violence and gained more trust from crowds to support the movement. Dr. King's technique in his Civil Right Movements was influence by Gandhi, who was a famous non violent protest leader in India. Nonviolent marches showed Dr. King's caring brave heart to his brothers and sisters who already had so much pain in their heart. Moreover, it showed his capability to handle this situation and lead other protestors in his direction.

Additionally, I think Dr. King and his family were very devoted. His family was threatened both physically and mentally many times, but they would never give up and still kept moving forward with his protesting. They had kids who could be harm by his enemies anytime but they chose to fight more than ran away. They did not only fight for their children, but they did fight for all of African-American children as well. From the civil right movements, Dr. King had opponents who were disagreement with his idea. Those people did not want to lose their powers. Beside, some of them desired to get rid him and family. Dr. King fought for his dream until the last day of his life. He was assassinated by someone who hated him on April 1968 in Memphis, Tennessee, where he was to lead a protest march for striking workers of the city.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. performed many things in his lifetime. He especially believed in equality. He fought hard to make peace, and change the minds of many people. He used his life brought the truly freedom to American. This freedom could not come true, if he did not have a strong brave heart, brilliant protesting strategy, and great devotion. Although Dr. King passed away a long time ago, but American and people all around the world cherish his memory. To many he is still considered a hero.
alexxlen 2 / 5  
Oct 11, 2011   #2
This is a really good start. Try using some more active verbs rather than "to be" verbs.
"Before taking English Composition class, I had only heard of Dr. King only from the United Stated federal holiday, and I was curious about him."

I suggest taking out the second "only".

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